MimsieSky

Swirling around my head...

2012-01-07T17:40:00.005-05:00

TiLT

2011-08-18T21:14:00.006-04:00

I'm having a crappy time of life right now...Time to start this baby up again.

~My Apartment.- Feels like home alright. We've only lived here for 1.5 months, but it's us and it's totally what I want to come home to at the end of the day.

~Netflix.- I will sing your praises for a lifetime. I've watched so much in the past year, it's kinda ridiculous. I honestly don't know how I used to live.

~My boy.- I can't even put him into words. He's amazing enough to feel 100% about signing a year lease after only dating for 4 months (knowing for 4.5). I'm so thankful he's in my life. I don't think I'll ever get tired of him. I'm so incredibly proud of him. He's the best. /girlfriend swoon moment.

~Pee Wee Herman.- The picture of him over my couch. It just makes me smile when I look at it.

~The ocean.- And jumping around in the (warm) waves on the perfect day. :)

~A room of friends.- Having my friends over to play. It's probably one of my favorite things.

~Statue of liberty.- I can see her from my roof deck. I don't think it'll ever get old.

~Seagulls.- Watching them try to fly against the wind so they don't move or go sideways. Same with watching them walk.

~Imagining the future.

~Gelaskins.- Creating a skin for my phone with Gallifreyan writing! So excited to get it!

~Laying in bed on a rainy morning.

~She hit Pause.- I finally got my Girl with the plane. Signed by the artist. :)

~Shoe Rack.- Is it so wrong to be in love with a cabinet that holds shoes? I don't think so.

~Heroes.- oh dear lord. it's riddled with inconsistencies, and odd story lines....but it's damn good.

~Having a sense of humor.- I'd probably be 10 times worse off at this point without it.

TiLT

2011-04-21T11:59:00.003-04:00

It's been a while...huh? :)

-Nice weather
-Knowing what I'm doing
-Mr. Man (Best Best Best Best Best!!!)
-Going for runs (even if I'm terribly out of shape!)
-Singing
-Planning trips to far off places WITH someone! :D
-Awaiting mystery pretty dresses!
-My boat shoes (once I've worked out the sore spots!)
-Flowery trees
-Big salads
-Adele's new album (amazing!)
-Quick rides home
-My iPad and Accessory shopping for it!! :D
-Smiling
-Anticipation of Yoga
-Doctor Who!!! (Re-watching with Mr. and super pumped for the new episodes!)
-Sitting next to an open window

TiLT

2011-02-10T21:38:00.004-05:00

-The smile on my face.
-Rocking out to 90's songs with my roomies
-Honesty
-Rainy days
-Laughing at being scared
-Ice skating and not falling on my ass
-Sleeping next to someone
-Walking around Manhattan on a Sunny warm day :)
-Make your own Muppet at FAO Schwartz. OH. MY. GOD. HEAVEN!
-Harry potter movie stuff at FAO...Awe.
-BIG PIANO
-Looking at pretty sparkly things in Tiffany's (My eyes were so wide!)
-Singing along to fun songs over dinner
-Having 2 days off this week...Oh right...I'm part time!
-10pm pizza
-Sleeping!
-Plans
-having things to look forward to again :)

Wow.

2011-02-04T12:11:00.004-05:00

Another reason I can't always look past it.
I get a daily e-mail- This is for this weekend, usually talking about that day and the days surrounding...

"And Venus is now in Capricorn - moving to aspect Jupiter, Pluto and the Karmic Node
of the Moon in the next week. This means fate is at work and situations can develop
tres quickly. It's a quickening. Things that are meant to happen start to happen, awareness,
and libido are sky-high." -Mystic Medusa

Uhhh. What?
No details here, but trust me, it applies.

TiLT

2011-02-04T00:07:00.004-05:00

Things I love Thursday

-Staying up for a good reason
-Feeling comfortable at work
-Learning to set a studio up and climbing catwalks
- Twitter encouragement
-Bagels with Cream cheese and Lox...Dangerous and amazing.
-Long chats
-Having my BFF visit for the night, for the first time since I've moved.
-Mindblowing Italian food and Skeeball. :)
-Sleepy weekends
-Brunch with roomies
-Quoting anchorman more than I have probably ever.
-Looking forward to the summer
-Yoga with new Yoga buddies
-Someone playing with my hair
-Home cooked meals
-"Remember... I read about your zodiac."
"So you trust the stars then?"
"I told you wanted to be an astronaut!"
-Puppy sitting at work
-Pizza, wine, and cupcakes with good friends after a rough day
-Letting the DVD intro play
-Smiling
-Plans
-Feeling content
-Starbucks and Vegas
-Rapping
-Blankets
-Hugs

TiLT

2011-01-27T21:33:00.003-05:00

-My Job (long hours, but I really don't mind being there!)
-Morning Dance Parties
-My room mate situation (the best yet.)
-Texting with boys who you just met
-Thinking about getting a new smartphone
-Trudging through a foot of snow first thing in the morning
-Yoga to the People (LOVE going to the classes and the teachers are helpful, nice, and funny!)
-Spontaneous apartment parties
- Good hugs
-Scoring a number without even trying
-The two scarf technique
-Feeling good realizing that I've purchased everything In my entire outfit with money I've earned. I still love that feeling.
-Bagels with Lox and Cream cheese!!! :D
-My 'me' time

TiLT

2011-01-22T12:15:00.005-05:00

(Saturday Edition)

I haven't done one of these since 2010... so it's a round up of things I can think of loving since then! :)

-Getting a job!
-Eating healthier
-Attending yoga at least 2 times a week from now on
-Balls of yarn that contain all of my favorite colors
-7am dance parties
-Getting to pet a dog every day (and having dog envy. WANT!)
-Spending the day with my best friend
-Successful shopping trips
-Working across the street from a Vespa store and dreaming about buying one to ride to work every day :)
-Meeting really awesome people who write really awesome books
-Being asked my opinion
-Upcoming teleprompter operator training (!!)
-Discussing YouTube with the Camcorder guy at Best Buy
-New Pashminas
-New (almost) Tiffany blue stationary
-Late night relaxing train rides home looking at the NY skyline
-Giggling in a corner with my friends and being ridiculous
-When you find out someone really exciting is following you on a site
-Finding that my Roommates taped a picture of Daniel Radcliff to my door.
-This: http://twitpic.com/3ptrgr "No Karen, it needs to be MORE obnoxiously Rad."
-Scripting a video and having people really enjoy it.
-"I make awesome decisions in Bike Stores"
-Making purchases with VidCon in mind
-Internet YouTube t-shirt shopping sprees
-Being told that I should brush up on ProTools because they want me to help with Audio at work EEEEEE!!!!!
-"Feel I'm on the verge of some great truth/ Were I'm finally in my place."
-Having to convince 2 workers at American Eagle that I know what size jeans I wear (They kept telling me that I was smaller than that. it was funny.)
-Miraculously having ideas for videos
-Sleeping in
-Feeling useful again
-Smiling
-wearing my giant hunter boots and sloshing through puddles in Manhattan
-Singing it out after a long day

Horoscopes

2011-01-06T12:08:00.003-05:00

I know some people don't believe in horoscopes and all that, but I find that in my life so far, some things happen that have been predicted...Even if I didn't know that they were predicted until after the fact.
This bit I knew about since December, but everything lined up without much effort on my part.

"This one this month, on January 4, will be far friendlier and will emphasize money you earn, spend, save, and manage. " -AstrologyZone.com

January 4th- Applied for job/ Scheduled interview an hour later.
January 5th- Interviewed for job
January 6th- Offered/Accepted position

Um...Yeah. You can't tell me that's not the least bit thought provoking.
Now let's hope the rest is that accurate! haha

A Red Blessing for this New Year

2010-12-31T12:14:00.004-05:00

May health high-five your cells
May serenity slide down your spine
May pleasure punch your panties
And may you remember that it's ALL divine

(Love)

May trust meet your every corner
May beauty smooch your every curve
May life remind you that it's now or never
And that you were created to Serve

(Love)

May forgotten deities paint your eyelids
And giddy angels spank your ass
May your heart tell you to Bring It
And your soul declare its' sass

(Love)

May fire claim your false
And courage nourish your true
May laughter pump your belly
And passion usher in your New

(Love)

May authenticity suck your toes
And fear forget its' name
May you unleash your Red Hot and Holy power
And may this planet never be the same.

Happy New Year!

-Sera Beak-
(Author of one of my favorite books ever; "The Red Book". If you are into religion and metaphysics I HIGHLY recommend her book.)

TiLT

2010-12-30T22:23:00.005-05:00

-Things I Love Thursday-

- Buying Christmas presents that I'm super excited to give
- Puppies in sweaters and bows
- Finding a bag that I thought was all bought up at TJMaxx a week after I first saw it.
- Seeing my idol perform less than 50 feet from me and crying from happiness
- Having my most favorite people sitting around a big table with me
- Dressing up
- Lunch, tea, and cake with my BFF on my b-day at Lady M on the upper east side. :)
- The ability to wear my hair in a bun again
- New vitamins and supplements
- My other BFF getting engaged and texting me a picture of her new sparkly!
- A clean room
- Seeing a giant flock of turkeys on my parents lawn
- Considering Voice lessons, Yoga, Tap classes, and singing with a group.
- Getting wear out of my Hunter boots
- New Years plans!
- Registering for VidCon 2011!!!
- Committing to my Collab channel for another year (oh dear god what have I done?)
- Listening to Josh Groban on Christmas morning
- My palm being read at a glance on the subway (Scarily accurate personality report)
- My new Mustache Labbit, Watson. He's hilariously awesome.
- Someone donating to The Uncultured Project on my behalf for my birthday. Super sweet gift!
- New Pajamas :)
- Stocking up on Soup and Veggies after eating so much sugar for a week
- Researching new hairstyles
- New Music (Kanye's new album and Katherine Jenkins)
- Cuddling up in my bed on a cold night
<3

2010 Survey!

2010-12-27T21:41:00.001-05:00

1. What did you do in 2010 that you’d never done before?
Went to a convention, Moved to NYC

2. Did you keep your New Year’s Resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't think I made any, and probably not. Just keep up with the life plan :)

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Nope.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
My Grandpa passed away and a really awesome girl I was friends with in High School passed away. But I wasn't particularly close to either.

5. What countries did you visit?
Stayed in the US this year.

6. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010?
A Job that I actually want to be doing, more focus, a puppy.

7. What dates from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Vidcon dates, Seeing the Backstreet boys in concert for the 5th time, My last day at my job, The day I moved to Brooklyn

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
MOVING OUT OF MY PARENTS HOUSE! ...and Tying for 1st place in my 2nd golf tournament. haha

9. What was your biggest failure?
Not sure anything was really a big fail this year...

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Some weird allergic reaction after my move this year.

11. What was the best thing someone bought you?
The flowers Todd sent me during an awful week and tickets to see "A little night music" with Bernadette Peters and Elaine Stritch for my b-day.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My parents for helping me move...Every person who helped me get through the insanity of Vidcon...and of course my friends for putting up with me constantly.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
um...Not sure.

14. Where did most of your money go?
To moving. Between saving all year for it and the actual act of moving and now having to pay rent...That's where my money is going. haha

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Meeting some of my first internet friends in person at Vidcon. That was something that I waited entirely too long to do. Also seeing "A little night music" one of my few tears of joy moments. Also living on my own again.

16. What song will always remind you of 2010?
Last.fm says some of my top songs of the year were:
-Lady Gaga- Telephone
-Passion Pit- Little Secrets
-Robyn- Fembot
-Kate Nash- Merry Happy
-Alex Day- Time of your life
-Britney Spears- 3
-ALL CAPS- Don't unplug me
-Backstreet Boys- All of your life (you need love)
-Passion Pit- Sleepyhead
-Cee-Lo- F*ck you

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? The Happier
b) fatter or skinner? probably about the same right now.
c) richer or poorer? Richer.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Spending time with friends...Making out.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
laying around

20. How do you plan to spend Christmas?
I spent it at home with my parents

21. Did you fall in love in 2010?
No

22. How many one night stands?
None.

23. What was your favorite TV program?
Big Bang Theory, The Secret Life of the American Teenager, Doctor Who, Dexter

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Not really. I don't actually HATE anyone...

25. What was the best book you read?
The Hunger Games series. Finished that in a week!

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Passion Pit, LIGHTS, and The Constellations

27. What did you want and get?
Yes. I wanted to move, and I did. :D

28. What did you want and not get?
A partner in crime that I can make out with...the universe thinks I'm not ready yet I suppose.

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 27 and had dinner with some of my best friends in Brooklyn :)

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Less stress more cuddling.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010?
I'm not sure I can. I'm just figuring it out now that I've gotten rid of most of my clothes before I moved. I guess it's kinda hipster/boho/urban...maybe? Most of this year was also spent in work clothes and PJs.

33. What kept you sane?
My Friends and the knowledge that I'd get what I want soon.

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Um...Not really anyone I guess.

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Not sure. I guess the health care issue.

36. Who do you miss?
My BFFs, My YouTube friends

37. Who was the best new person you met?
Mike Lombardo, Alex Carpenter, Jason Munday, youtube people etc..etc...

38. What was the best thing you ate?
Pink Taco after a long and tiring weekend at Vidcon. Also, my b-day dinner! :)

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010?
Be Patient and persistent. Also, it always comes down to 2 bearings.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
Can't really put it all in a single song lyric. too much.

Intentions= out there.

2010-12-20T23:03:00.005-05:00

Dear Universe,
Today is my birthday, I am now 27 years old. I have learned throughout these many years that experiences and personal relationships are much more valuable to me than jewelry or toys. Therefore this year I am requesting a few simple things from you.
First; Now that I have completed my goal of moving out of my parent's house and having a place of my own in the city, I would like a job. This job must be stimulating and educational and very preferably in the Media production industry. It would be extremely appreciated if I received this within the first 2 months of 2011.
Next; I know we've had our fair share of interactions about romantic relationships in the past 3-4 years, and I see what you've been throwing at me. I get it. What I would like is to have the opportunity to put it into action with something a bit more serious than I've had during this time. I'd like to have someone who makes me happy and who I can make happy. Someone to make waves with and who will go on adventures. We both know what I need in a person and I think we can both agree that it's time.
Finally; I would like general health and happiness not only for myself, but for the people that are most important to me.
I felt a field of optimism this morning. I felt the possibilities. And I think you and I can rock out and have a fabulous time this year. It's you and me, Universe. Let's do this.
With Love and Respect,
Cait

TiLT

2010-12-02T15:16:00.002-05:00

-Comfy sweaters
-Goofing around with my parents
-Finally owning all the Harry Potter DVDs
-Coming home after being gone for a few days
-The upcoming viewing of "A little night music" on Broadway starring effing Bernadette Peters and Elaine Stritch!!! *drool*
-Finding new yummy places to eat
-Upright Citizens brigade
-Rain boots
-new tea
-Interview at HBO
-Chelsea Market at Christmas time One. Two. Three.
-Buying unnecessary items at kitchen stores
-getting a good night sleep
-reading The Onion and Time Out
-Trying on Hats
-Acupuncture

TiLT

2010-11-18T14:01:00.004-05:00

-Feeling settled in my new home and new city
-My body finally cooperating with me
-Soup from Whole Foods!
-Job possibilities
-Awesome Dates with an awesome guy
-The Floating Kabarette in Dumbo...Hilarious, sexy, Awkward, and a fantastic time!
-FINALLY having my recording Nook all set up! http://yfrog.com/jqjc4ej http://yfrog.com/mstm7yj
-Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows!!!! Tickets for 10:30am tomorrow!
-The listeners of DFTBA Radio...They were the ones that made it memorable.
-Netflix
-a nice man at B&H who introduced me to my new husband (his words)...my "tall dark and handsome" tripod. He knows how it is. ;)
-Pretty new dresses
-Girl talk at a noodle bar
-Catching up with friends
-VidCon Anticipation!!
-Sudden cleaning/organizing sprees

TiLT

2010-11-04T12:12:00.002-04:00

-Having friends come visit
-All Access at W00Tstock on Broadway (I was backstage on broadway!) :)
-Adam Savage (from Mythbusters) Standing next to me and saying this about the "Nom Nom" Song- "I fucking love this! I fucking can't get enough of this shit!"
-Meeting Grant Imahara (from Mythbusters)
-Watching The Rally for Sanity online from the comfort of my bed
-Getting all of my bank stuff FINALLY worked out
-Buying new colorful Pashminas in Chinatown for $5 each
-Visiting my parents for the first time since I've moved
-Getting some good quality sleep for the first time in a while
-Figuring out solutions to room problems I've been having
-Having Mexican food delivered! (I've only ever known Pizza and Chinese delivery)
-Cooler weather so I can cuddle up in my bed at night :)
-Meeting new people
-Starting to get my life in order!

TiLT

2010-10-28T23:37:00.003-04:00

Wow time for another one of these ALREADY?! Okay! :)

-My new Amy Pond sweatshirt
-My new BLUE beret!
-Running errands and realizing that I fit right in as a New Yorker (hat, boots, cute coat, skinny jeans, American Apparel bag, and a hot Dean and Deluca Beverage!)
-FINALLY starting to feel better
-Reading the Hunger Games series in less than a week. 3 books...I'm sure that's a record.
-being shown an amazing hat store..and getting hats put on my head the second I walk in, getting $5 off from a really awesome sales associate :)
-The Social Network and the havoc it's wreaking on my brain
-Chatting with my roommates about lots of random things :)
-Cleaning up my room and unpacking a few things that I've neglected for the past month
-Painting my nails again
-Starting my day with Sons of Admirals
-Being a little excited about going home next week

TiLT

2010-10-21T17:29:00.002-04:00

-Mandatory sick days for myself so I get better
-Doctor Who! on Netflix I'm totally obsessed now
-DW Confidential, I'm totally all for behind the scenes stuff
-FINALLY finishing Lolita (THANK GOD!)
-Getting 2 phone calls from 2 of my favorite people before even getting out of bed
-Almost 100 New YouTube subscribers in under a week! WOW!
-Being productive
-Crumbs Cupcakes
-New Books
-Being able to intelligently discuss plots and theories with my friends on BlogTV
-The lovely weather
-Quiet weekends when the M is down :)
-getting Meds that will hopefully make my body act normal again
-Finally feeling myself start to settle

TiLT

2010-10-14T19:51:00.003-04:00

-Taking some time to relax
-YouTube crushes
-Getting stuff done
-Being able to sleep
-Spending time with the BFF
-This Tweet That my BFF wrote on my twitter
-Shopping in Soho WITH someone
-3 amazing meals in a row
-Finding neighborhoods that I'm in love with in NYC
-Feeling like I'm gonna fit here...it's just gonna take some time.
-Cooking (even if it is something simple and small)
-Crazy thunderstorms
-Remembering to stretch
-Visiting the Big Gay Ice Cream Truck
-Love and Sequins #11- SO MANY NEW PLACES TO GO TO...and also...Knowledge of places I wished were in NYC, and actually are!
-Having my first NY Bagel since I've moved here (SOOO GOOD!)
-Exploring Prospect Park

TiLT

2010-10-08T10:30:00.002-04:00

-Reconnecting with old friends
-24 Hour best buys
-Free cookies at closing time
-Comic book themed bar
-Crazy bands that play the A-Team and Doogie Howser MD Theme song.
-Giving accurate subway directions to someone :)
-Any Meal ever at Pret A Manger
-Renaissance fairs
-Finding out that there are actually quiddich teams
-"I got 99 problems but a Snitch ain't one!"
-My First pedicure Though I'm not sure I'd get one very often. My toes look the same as they did before.
-Lifetime supply of Gummy Bears delivered to our door.
-Roommate making extra Pumpkin muffins for me and our other roomie
-Manhattan day ->Metropolitan museum, Central park, Shoe shopping, Crumbs, & Street Vendor food all day long! :)
-Trying on funny hats and hats that are entirely too expensive.
-Having the apartment to myself
-Doing the show again...even if I was too exhausted to function.
-The Triple Rainbow Awesome tour and not being able to stop smiling the entire time.
-YouTube crushes haha
-Big Hugs from friends I don't see a lot.
-Slowing down
-Netflix

TiLT

2010-09-30T13:17:00.003-04:00

It's been a rough week...But I know I can find some good stuff...
-Shopping in Chinatown and FINALLY getting to Topshop
-Seeing all the British stores that are in NYC, I NEVER KNEW THEY WERE HERE!
-Pretty bowls
-Dinner with the lovely Amanda Followed by Urban Outfitters and 16 Handles!! NOM!
-Roommate bonding time (I FINALLY have some roommates that I get along with! SCORE!)
-Funny car rides
-Awesomely silly and fun parties
-Dressing as a bunny with Homemade ears (http://dailybooth.com/MimsieSky/8644209)
-The subway stop outside my window being closed for a few days. AHH Quiet. :)
-Life slowing down a bit
-Grocery shopping
-Long walks on nice days
-earplugs
-making plans

TiLT

2010-09-23T11:57:00.004-04:00

-My new apartment/Room!!!! (pictures)
-FINALLY FINALLY moving out of my parents house. I Feel all growed up now!
-My new desk corner...it's like a tiny office! With a Brick Wall! :D
-Successfully putting together Ikea Furniture. WOOT!
-International Talk like a Pirate day (9/19) and celebrating by watching Pirates of the Caribbean 3!
-Being able to sleep through the subway trains outside my window
-Getting everything done in a day that I needed to
-Watching lightening from the top of a double decker bus :)
-Seeing the NYC skyline from my subway train on the way home.

TiLT

2010-09-16T20:42:00.003-04:00

-My First ever Trip to Ikea: I've heard so much about it, but have never really had reason to drive 3 hours to see it all. Since I'm moving, I wanted to redecorate and get some better furniture than the mix and match hand me down stuff. So My mom and I went and it was amazing. We wandered the showroom and picked out the setups that we wanted to live in, and I found SO MUCH STUFF that I loved. I spent about $1000 there. I'm so excited to see it all laid out!
-Finding things that I forgot I had
-My blue Dishes (I HAVE 4!! I forgot!)
-Signing the lease to my new place!
-FINALLY ordering the "You are so F*cking awesome" poster
-When I calm down from all the stress and get excited about moving again

TiLT

2010-09-10T21:54:00.002-04:00

-Puppies
-FINDING AN APARTMENT IN BROOKYLN!!!
-Packing (I Move down next weekend!! YESSS!)
-Talking to your best friend
-Daria on DVD
-Non stressful travel experiences
-Driving around SoCal in a convertible drinking a smoothie
-The discovery that there are no Cheerleaders for Malibu High School's Football team (WHAT?!)
-Wifi on flights
-Flight maps!
-Scott Pilgrim! Ramona Flowers and Knives Chow *Swoon*!
-My bed
-Scarf Weather!!
-See Lemon bars, Covet Lemon bars, Get Lemon Bars, Eat Lemon Bars. NOM!
-having to be an adult and look at bedding and curtains and such for my apartment. (see also annoying)
-Getting paid for an extra week at work (SCORE!)
-NEW SUPER CUTE SNEAKERS!
-Decorating my new room in my mind...Blue, Grey, Black. OH SO GOOD! :)

TiLT

2010-08-26T11:49:00.000-04:00

-Sleeping until the afternoon when you really need it
-Seeing my room slowly come apart as I pack, clean, discard, and donate my life.
-My brand new ipod that is covered with this: http://tinyurl.com/295y6ey And is now named "Cupcake"
-Megabus & Amtrak replacing Metro North. (I'm SOO over M.N.)
-Yummy food with friends :)
-Discussing the sociological dynamics of the Teletubbies and reading their descriptions on Wikipedia :D
-Planning last minute trips to California for labor day to see my dude. :)
-Finally trying the SUPER chocolatey cake at the cafe I get lunch from.
-Looking forward to a break.

LOVE LOVE LOVE

2010-08-16T15:41:00.000-04:00

TiLT

2010-07-29T14:56:00.000-04:00

-Half days at work
-Seeing my friends play their music live
-New Friends
-Thunderstorms
-6 pairs of Victoria Secret Undies for $15…amazing.
-Planning more YouTube gatherings (this one closer to home)
-Using “OM NOM NOM” as a term of affection
-Making plans
-Adorable boys
-Productivity
-Thinking of Pots and Pans (It makes me excited to move out of my parents house.)
-Feeling a bit more relieved and less stressed about my move.
-Future houses
-Starting my mom’s 60th birthday dinner with crazy dancing with my dad
-Ending my mom’s 60th dinner birthday with Dead baby/Helen Keller jokes.
-Sunshine

TiLT

2010-07-22T12:05:00.001-04:00

~Convention In jokes: Oh you’d get it, if you were there. :)
~Communication and Understanding
~New music: that isn’t all so new…but still awesome!
~My bed
~Spending a few hours with my friends on Coney Island. I miss them!
~Ice Cream and hot dogs on the beach
~Super amazingly sweet and hilarious Twitter friends! :)
~Naps in my car during my lunch breaks. YUM!
~Songs that are perfect for my life at this moment
~Tying up loose ends for my company outing
~My Podcast Live Shows. People are awesome.
~Productive days
~Honesty
And last but totally not least
~My brand new boyfriend! haha it’s gonna take me a while to wrap my head around calling him that. But it’s fun and makes me smile! :D

Curious Tuesday

2010-07-20T10:06:00.002-04:00

Via Galadarling.com

1. What is your very best beauty tip?
Wash makeup off every night (I use baby wipes. Cheap and Effective) I used to leave it and my skin was constantly gross the next day. Use a good light moisturizer, Smile.

2. Who is your arch-nemesis?
Haters, Doubters, and Litterers.

3. What are the three things you need to do in order to feel sane?
Sing. I feel anxious if I don't for a long time.
Sleep. I'm very pro-Sleep. I'm also a night owl and wake up at 6 for my job. It's kind of unfortunate.
Travel. I get tired of seeing the same things over and over again. I need to see and experience new things every so often.

4. What is the strangest food you have ever eaten?
I don't often eat strange things, but I've had Escargots and Dried Squid before. I actually really enjoy Dried Squid, and Escargots just tastes like really garlicy seafood. Neither are really weird.

5. What is one thing in your wardrobe which makes you feel invincible?
I have a few dresses that I LOVE to wear, but don't very often. But they are my favorites and I've had them for a few years. :)

TiLT

2010-07-15T14:20:00.000-04:00

-VidCon 2010: A new convention for video makers. It was this past weekend and it was just amazing. It makes me proud to feel like I'm a part of something big and something amazing. YouTube is NOT just for silly videos and illegal TV show uploads. It's for amazing people and ideas.

-My Friends: I finally got to meet a handful of my favorite people that I've known for the past 2+ years. It was the most normal feeling to be with them, but it was fantastic.

-Todd Williams: One of my Best Friends and my Podcast Co-host. He is amazing, and sweet, and funny, and hands down the best. I'm so lucky to have him in my life.

-DFTBA Records: The booth we ran this week was always occupied by interns, artists, or fans. It was nice having everyone around. We are unique in many ways, but my favorite is how we are all friends and all enjoy each others company and are willing to help each other out and support one another. It's really great to see.

-Dancing on stage: I got to dance on stage to one of my favorite songs with a group of people...while the audience all danced along with us. It makes me so happy to watch and think about.

-Ball Pits: Even more fun when you are an adult and you are sure that there is nothing sketchy at the bottom. Also, Sorting the balls by color while singing songs and throwing them. :) Immediate mood lifter. I will have a ball pit at my home eventually.

-Double Rainbow: Oh Auto Tune the News...You've made my life. This is now the term to use when you want to say something is Intense/Epic/Amazing. Live it, love it.

-New Friends: I met a lot of people I've wanted to meet for a long time, and some new people I didn't even know about. Point is, they are all amazing and I'm looking forward to getting to know them.

-Sparkly Silver Minnie ears: They are shiny and make me happy.

-Six Flags Magic Mountain: Epic Roller coasters. I've missed riding coasters! They are too fun! :D

You're real tonight you're real

2010-07-14T23:35:00.001-04:00

I don't think I can put this all into words.
I just got back from my trip to California and vidcon yesterday and it was all so...everything.

Wednesday I left super early and hopped a flight to LA. I got there pretty painlessly and was picked up by Todd and Craig. It was pretty great. On the drive to Disney we all sat in the car singing along to the radio and trying to read google maps on our phones. Craig is an excellent backup singer.
We got to Disney and met up with about 17 other people. Some I've met before, others I haven't, but by the end of the day, we were all friendly. We went on Pirates, the haunted mansion, and The Tower of Terror (which was terrifying. I was laughing and crying.) We were gonna do the soaring over California ride, but there was an earthquake right before we got on and they had to make us leave. So we walked around and then went to see the Aladdin show. By that time we were sleepy so there was a big group hug and we set out for Todd's.
There was a good amount of traffic because of an accident so it took a really long time to get there, but we went to In N Out for dinner and it was delicious. I was up for 24 hours by the time I got to sleep. but it was good to finally lay down.

Thursday we got up kind of early and got ready and threw our stuff in the car and went to breakfast at Ihop. It was YUM and lovely as ever to sit with Todd and Craig and be silly. After we drove to Six Flags to meet up with Molly, Chris, Alex, Becky, and Johnny. We went on SO MANY ROLLER COASTERS. Goliath was Terrifying and I do believe Alex will agree with me. But it was probably the best coaster I've ever been on. It was quite sunny that day so it was exhausting and we had to keep putting our bags in $1 1 use lockers. LAME. So I was pretty dehydrated without water or money to buy water. Good call Six Flags. We left around lunchtime and head into LA to the Hotel.
When we got there Craig got stopped so many times. we just stood around with our bags waiting and saying hi to people we ran into. We finally got upstairs to put our stuff down. Ran to the mall for some food and then started the frustrating and stressful time of figuring out where things are and what we needed and how to get it. Luckily our friend Nick was around with his car and drove us to Staples for poster board and markers. We didn't eat dinner that night with all the craziness, but it was SO FUN to see everyone as they arrived. I just told them where we were and how to find us. It was great. it was super stressful trying to get things done, but by the end of the night with everyone's cheerful help, things were alright and we got to sleep around 12.

Friday was insane. We got up early and went to set everything up for the day. We were mobbed with people. All day. Anytime there was free time or food breaks there were loads of people at our booth. After the first few waves we figured out a way to do things. even if we had a hiccup or two, we worked through it and figured it out. We had help, which was absolutely amazing. We couldn't have done it without Kris, Beka, Bobby and Chris. Our brains were goo by the end of the day and their mathy heads were quite helpful. As well as their tally hands. We sold a lot that day and talked to a lot of people. it was pretty insane. The day ended when I got to see half of the DFTBA concert and I got to dance on stage with All caps, which was a fabulous release from the day. We finished working around 12am. Crappy. 17 hours straight of work. The only time I left the booth was to run to the mall to bring us back food and to see the last half of the concert. It was exhausting.

Saturday I woke up early, with far too little sleep and was in a horrible mood. I was just sitting at the booth venting to Todd for a good 20 mins. Finally after people arrived Beka and I ran over to the Ball Pit. The second I walked into the room I felt SO MUCH BETTER. It was hilarious and fun and nostalgic (even though i was rarely allowed in a ball pit when I was little). We all sang songs and sorted the balls by color and video taped and took pictures and played. it was great. When I returned to the booth, I was in MUCH better spirits. The day was less busy than the previous, but it was still about 13 hours long with a lunch run, and I got to watch ShayCarl talk and Dan Brown announce his project. People were less rabid on Saturday and we got to chat with some and do fun things with them when there wasn't a crowd. It was actually fairly enjoyable, considering. I also got to Talk to Julia Nunes, who was in a booth across from us, for a little bit. Found out she's much more local than I thought! haha It was cool. :) also got to take some pictures with people as they came to say hi. AND we wrapped up around dinner time when it got dead. So we had dinner for the first time in 2 days with some lovely people at the mall, then we returned and attended the concert and saw Julia Nunes, Charlie, David Choi, and AutoTune the News. All of which were great. and we got to socialize a bit. I chatted with Stefan and Raven, and there was a crew we knew behind us that were fun. And then we went to bed early(ish).

Sunday we got up bright and early for John's signing. we set up the booth quickly and moderated the line when we let people in. We gave away all the free stuff and managed to sell most of John's stuff. and sold more CDs and pins. It was pretty great. and we got to chat with people as they wandered by to get to John. When he was done, the room was pretty empty except for our friends, so we wrapped early. Everyone helped us clean up and put stuff away and we went to brunch, which was nice. We sat and ate at a table of people we worked with and enjoyed. A nice Booth family breakfast. :) Did some random visiting and then went to the World Cup final. I was quite sleepy for most of it, but it was enjoyable to spend more time with people and laugh at John's crazy reactions. The Netherlands lost, unfortunately...but it was okay. We walked around and hugged people and the grabbed the stuff and packed Todd's car up. When he drove away I felt really sad. Even if I was going to see him the next night, it was still sad because it was over. I hung out with Jess and Lidewij (lee-da-vi) and made some videos with Jess for my channel and for NFI. Then ventured out with their friend James for dinner. We hit up Pink Taco...and it was epic and yummy (we called it "Double Rainbow"...it was fitting.). When we got back to the hotel we chatted a bit with Secret Brother Tom and sat around in the lobby. I was falling asleep and at that point my voice was horrible. I shouldn't have been talking. Plus I was sad and didn't want to be social. So I went upstairs and repacked my bag and watched some videos and finally decided to get some sleep. I needed it. I went to bed around 10. it was pretty great.

Monday we got up around 8:30 (which was MUCH later than I had been getting up...5:30) and got ready and packed up. We hung out in the Lobby for a while. After a while we walked over to the mall and wandered for a bit. Got some Pinkberry and it was amazing. and shopped a bit, and got some pretzels and went back to the hotel because Jess had to leave soon. It was super sad to see her go. I wish I had more time to spend with her. She's awesome. :) After I chatted a bit with Lidewij, Lee, and Adam about DFTBA and about the next vidcon. It was nice to chat with new people. Though I felt kind of bad because I was so tired and preoccupied with the end of VidCon. Todd got out of work early so I only had to sit around for an hour after Jess left. I said my goodbyes and hopped into the car when he got there. and we went to the mall. -_- He wanted Pizza, so we chilled in the food court...again. Then after some wandering we decided to go to Santa Monica. We parked and wandered around the 3rd st promenade then out to the boardwalk and over to the pier. It was SUCH a nice day. I'm really glad we went. we got Milkshakes and did a photo booth and wandered around. Unfortunately I had to get to the airport for my flight at 11, so it was a quick visit. We got to the airport and I started bawling in the car. I've cried every time I've gone home when I've had to fly somewhere with the exception of my last trip to London because I really wanted to go home. But I got it together and went in and checked my bag...but started bawling my eyes out again before security when we had to say goodbye.
I got to my gate and found out that my flight was delayed until 12:30. LAME. There were so many people and I was tired and bored and spent way too much on a crappy sandwich and bottle of water at Starbucks. I found a spot in the hallway next to the water fountain to plug in my computer and phone. When we boarded I was excited because there was an empty middle seat like on the way. But as soon as we could, the old Mexican lady on the aisle MOVED OVER...WTF?! She was all up ons! She kept leaning a little too close to me to look out my window. IF YOU WANTED A WINDOW SEAT, YOU SHOULD HAVE ASKED FOR ONE! :P But I closed the window, put my headphones on and went to sleep. I actually slept most of the flight back. Which was great. I woke up because my ears started to hurt from the descent. I had 20 minutes to get to my flight, which was right next to where we were let off. I made it with about 6 minutes to spare. The flight back I was awake so they would feed me and it only lasted an hour. My dad got me at the airport and I went home and slept. :)

Vidcon was too much for words. There is so much more than I could say about it. So many stories I want to tell, but won't because I want to keep them for me to remember. The moments that I'll keep between me and the people I rarely get to see in person. The first hugs and handshakes and smiles. So many good things and a few bad. But the good much more outweighed the bad. I can't even begin to explain.
It's hard to talk about such a thing to people that don't understand. people that don't know what this is like. You become so close to people and develop these relationships without ever seeing these people in person and when you finally do, it feels so normal and comfortable. And it's amazing to be able to reference certain things and have people understand you or the situation. It's so much positive energy and happy times. I felt like I was going to explode.
it was super sad to leave, but I hope that it can happen again next year.
VidCon 2010 forever. <3

TiLT

2010-07-02T12:27:00.001-04:00

-The fact that in one week I will be in California with some of my best and favorite internet friends rocking out at VidCon2010 YAYYYY!!! (also...Disneyland as SOON as I get there.)
-The cake is the truth.
-Awesome and fun DFTBA Radio Broadcasts
-the New York Faerie Festival!!! I HAVE to go again next year! :D
-The NEW Harry Potter trailer. CHILLS!
-My Rollerskates
-Company lunches
-Sunshine
-My Filofax
-Relaxing evenings
-Planning trip details out in my head
-Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches
-Accomplishing tasks

Curious Tuesday

2010-06-29T11:11:00.004-04:00

From Galadarling.com

1. Where do you find inspiration?
I read a lot of blogs, and expose myself to a lot of art and music.
Other than that, My friends inspire me a great amount. They make me want to live my life better and enjoy it. They also inspire me to work hard and take chances.

2. Have you got any hobbies or interests you’ve let lapse & wish you would take up again?
I used to knit a lot. I would love to figure out how to get better at it. Playing instruments. I stopped taking any kind of lessons in 2004, it'd be great to start again now that I can concentrate better. Also, Dancing. I did it when I was little, and some in high school. I took some classes in college, but I haven't in a while. I miss dancing. :)

3. One tea party. Ten invitations. Who do you invite?
Hmmm...I'd love to be creative with this one, but at this point, it'd be fantastic just to have a party with my friends again. We haven't all been together in ages...if ever.

4. Who was your favourite teacher at school & why?
My favorite Teacher in college was also my advisor. He's hilarious and knows how to keep students engaged in their work. The classes I had him for were really interesting and we always got to listen to or watch really great stuff (Media classes). Also he introduced me to the GI Joe PSAs and invited me to create a story for NPR one semester. He still keeps in touch via Facebook and is always helpful.

5. Have you ever been in a long-distance relationship?
Too many. I dated a guy in England for 2 years (I'm in NY). I moved there for 6 of those months. I've also dated a guy across the country, and a guy a few hours away. As good as a couple of those relationships were...I'm officially done doing Long Distance.

TiLT

2010-06-25T08:51:00.000-04:00

-Figuring out when my last day of work will be (2 months from today! eep!)
-Watching (or listening to the TV) the World cup at work. Everyone gets SUPER excited when the US scores! It's funny.
-Buying tickets to see the backstreet boys (2nd time this summer!) even if I have no one to go with.
-Giving my dad a frame with 2 pictures in it (one of him and I when I was a baby and another more recent one) and making him cry! (I've never seen my dad cry!) It was super adorable! he was happy. :)
-LONG skype calls
-Father's Day Mexican dinner (YUM)
-Ordering New books from amazon (Lolita and Lowboy!)
-Ordering an Electric Blue Domino Personal Filofax!! (and having my BFF order the same one- TOTALLY UNPLANNED!) Hopefully it will be here today! eeee! :)
-Applying for REALLY AWESOME PERFECT FOR ME jobs (Send good vibes?)
-having Peanut Butter Jelly Time every day, and really looking forward to it. :)
-Finishing tasks
-Having mad burrito cravings and then getting one. Mmm Burittos
-Target shopping sprees! :)

Curious Tuesday (On Wednesday!)

2010-06-23T08:30:00.002-04:00

Questions posed on Galadarling.com.

1. If it was your birthday tomorrow, what would be on your wishlist?
-A job in NYC
-The Daria DVDs
- A dress from shabbyapple.com (YUM!)
- VIP passes to the Backstreet Boys concert in August

2. Do you look after your nails? Do you paint them? If so, do you have a colour that you keep returning to again & again?
I do! I never really used to, but I got this great little pen that cleans up the sides of my nails if I go a little crazy! I really like Pink and Purple nails and also Sparkles. I have this purple sparkle bottle that I got from Sephora around Christmas. It's amazing! :)

3. What star sign are you, & do you think it is accurate?
I'm a Sagg. and yeah for the most part it's pretty accurate. Saggos are known to be blunt, but I tend to hold back. but the Travel thing is Very correct! Also, I have a lot of attributes that Capricorns have. I was supposed to be a Cap. But was born on the last day of Sagg. Makes sense!

4. What is something you have recently learned to appreciate?
My parents. I've had to move back in with them after I finished school and I see how hard they work and how willing they are to help out if needed. We get along much better now.

5. What is your favourite city in the world, & why?
London. I lived there for a while and it's such a cool city! So much old and new mixed together and so many different people and cultures. Also I LOVE the fashion and music.
NYC is a close 2nd. It's really THE big city I've grown up going to. I love all the culture available there, and there is always something to do. I'm VERY much looking forward to moving there! :)

TiLT

2010-06-17T12:03:00.000-04:00

Seeing the Backstreet boys in concert for the 5th time; Christina Aguilera's new Album "Bionic" (Super sexy!); Dance parties; Another 24+ hours in NYC; Making plans for my first trip to Coney Island for Siren Fest!; Sexy messages; umbrellas; Crumbs Cupcakes; Little Korean Restaurants; Craft fairs; Blueberry juice; The DFTBA Listeners; Techno Girl Nail polish from Sephora; Digital Cameras; free online games; Going to LA soon; clear skin; This ; 2.5 months before I move on out! :D

Decisions

2010-06-01T10:26:00.003-04:00

It's funny how I make the big decisions in my life.
I get an idea in my head that I think is WAY out of the realm of possibility.
Then I think about it more, as whatever other decision I've made gets more difficult.
Then I think maybe I COULD in fact do this, but will still work on my first plan.
Then I Can't stop thinking about this other thing.
Then I compare the two.
Then I think, okay, this might work.
Then I Just all of a sudden, Drop the first plan and put all efforts into new plan.

This is how I decided between college and London, This is how I decided on my major, This is how I have approached every plan I've had since I've graduated. Unfortunately this last one has been a process and these changes have happened about 4 times now. California, Cali and School, London and School, NYC and School, NYC.

I'm moving in the fall. The school thing I thought would be simple...but it's the total opposite of that. Whomever makes up these loans is an idiot. No one who requires a loan to go to school is able to pay their loan off while they are busy in class. Unless they have parents who will do it for them. And this lady does not. That ticket has run out.
SO! Conveniently I've been saving up and I'd have enough to move out of my parent's house...however I don't want to stay here. So I guess I should go somewhere else then!
This is the challenging option for me. I'm scared to have to find another job. I've spent much of the past 2.5 years doing that. But I have to leave. I can't stand it up here anymore and I have to do this. Even if I'm not going back to school, this is a step in the right direction for me. This is what I need to get started.
I just have to go.
And this time, It's going to happen.

TiLT

2010-05-28T10:50:00.000-04:00

-Leaving work early on a Friday
-Finding a pair of jeans that I like and that fit on my first try!
-Warm weather
-My little pony nails! (O.P.I.'s Rumple's Wiggin' Shrek polish with Cover Girl's City lights over it!!!)
-Nail polish shopping spree (5 bottles in 1 weekend!!)
-Coming up with new plans after old ones fail. Instead of going to NYC for school...I'm just gonna quit my job and find a new one there instead!
-Being REALLY overly excited for said plans
-Adding more concerts to my summer schedule (Paramore & Tegan & Sara in the same lineup!!)
-My cousin offering to help me find a job in NYC (she's a headhunter...so um... YES!)
-Getting paid back money that I'd never thought I'd see again (Goes RIGHT into my NYC savings!!)
-Speculation about something that could be REALLY REALLY AWESOME...
-Taking a night to just relax and do nothing.
-Bigger than normal sandwiches for lunch.
-Smoothies
-Fruit cups
-Getting stuff done at work
-Having another really awesome show this week
-The Big Bang Theory (Mayim Bialik as Sheldon's GF?! WHAT?!)

TiLT

2010-05-21T09:24:00.001-04:00

This has been a very rough week, so time to be positive!
-Starting to run again
-Iron Man 2 and Ice Cream with moms and pops
-Sunshine!
-The Cupcake bus and lunch at the Circus Cafe
-This: http://twitter.com/MimsieSky/status/14299371015
-Spending time with a friend that lives far away for a night and talking a mile a minute to fit everything in!
-Shopping Yesstyle.com at work and planning on getting http://tinyurl.com/24cz62s and http://tinyurl.com/2uufl9t YAY! :D
-Getting crap news about funding for school but realizing that it's probably better this way.
-Getting work done
-The weekend.
-Taking control and being persistent.

TiLT

2010-05-06T12:23:00.003-04:00

-FINALLY FINALLY making a video for my "Such Great Heights" Cover! Turned out well, I think!
-Spending time with my BFF, Ally.
-Free Chair Massage and Acupuncture session...Seriously, I'm now SWEARING by Acupuncture. 20 minutes and the back pain that I've had for MONTHS is gone! I'll have to go back soon! :)
-Warm weather! HORRAYYY! :)
-Thinking about ordering a pack of Crumbs Cupcakes OM NOM NOM!
-Thunderstorms
-A Mystery 9lb. box traveling to my house holding what I can only assume to be a pair of back ordered rollerskates that I got a refund on... Return them? Keep them?! I DON'T KNOW! haha
-Resting my voice. It feels good when I try to sing again and the sound I want comes out
-Dreaming of a new Midi controller/Keyboard :)
-Actual dreams where I'm so happy I'm crying
-Cleaning my room...I mean, REALLY cleaning :)
-Relaxing Sundays
-New Dresses
-Making awesome programing decisions for DFTBA Radio in the upcoming months! :D

TiLT

2010-04-29T19:29:00.001-04:00

-Meeting YouTube Friends in person and having so much fun!!
-Shopping
-Getting back into the whole musician thing. Relearning the language and discussing topics again (it’s been 6 years!! WTF?!)
-Connecting people and names
-Soft Ice Cream
-Sleep!!
-Finally hitting our groove with our Podcast, Really awesome Format now!
-Rearranging plans to make more awesome plans
-The anticipation of making a really awesome Music video this week…if the weather cooperates with me so that I can FILM! rawrawr!
-FINALLY buying that Necklace from Cupcakes and Mace…SO excited to get it.
-Paying down my credit card. Always a good feeling!
-“The Prophet” by Kahlil Gibran it’s SOO lovely to read.
-Being super excited for my friends doing Super exciting things!

TiLT

2010-04-22T11:05:00.000-04:00

-Homemade pizza and Lord of the Rings with Friends
-Pretty new jewelry that my mom brought home from San Fransisco for me!
-Shopping at the amazing new Forever21 MEGASTORE in Albany, NY…Seriously rivals the F21 in Herald Sq!!
-Finding out that YouTube friends live nearby!! :D
-Insane BlogTV Spice Girl/Backstreet Boys parties
-Countdowns to NYC
-Getting the tickets to the 6/10/10 Backstreet Boys concert in the mail! YAYYYY!!!
-YouTube gatherings. My project that I did in 2008 is planning a gathering in NYC in 2011, I’m freaking out! These are some of my favorite people literally spread out around the world. IN ONE PLACE. Also…Vidcon is shaping up VERY nicely! I’m SUPER excited for July! :D
-The BEST episode of DFTBA Radio hour yet! 70+ viewers/Listeners, the perfect mix of crazy talk, and the best music the Label has to offer. SO FUN! and people really seemed to appreciate the show for once. 52 episodes is still insane to me! :)

Tikkun olam

2010-04-21T15:32:00.004-04:00

"Maybe it isn't that we're supposed to find the pieces and put them back together. Maybe we're the pieces."
-Nick- "Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist"
I kind of love this.

Breathe

2010-04-20T14:37:00.002-04:00

Every once in a while. I lose it. My brain goes off in all directions and it's very difficult to slow down. It's difficult to discount any thought that pops into my head. I have to sit down and calmly understand my thoughts and pick them apart and rationalize each one to make it shrink or disappear.
Now that things are starting to roll for me, this happens at least once a week. I have to get control of this and find my calm.
Be Patient, be confident, be happy.

TiLT

2010-04-15T14:23:00.001-04:00

-My first solo trip to and around NYC
-Enrolling in school in NYC for September!!!! YAYYY!
-Pret a Manger in Bryant park
-Walking from Herald Sq. to Columbus circle to 5th Ave to the Met and then back to Grand Central! :) (that’s over 10 miles btw!)
-Wandering through central park
-Aimlessly wandering around the Met Museum with my headphones on. I think I hit every section except for Asian art, which I have only found once.
-Trying my first Crumbs Cupcake. It’s AMAZING!!!
-House to myself for the week! It’s so peaceful and lovely :)
-FINALLY putting together my vision board
-Getting my Outdoor wheels for my skates, and figuring out how to put the bearings in, and then not killing myself on the hills in my neighborhood! Horray!
-having an all around nice week!
-Green outdoors!!
-The movie “New York, I love you.” it’s not typical, no real plot, but nice little vignettes set in NYC. very interestingly put together movie.
-Singing backups on a song for my Friend’s new Album! wee!
-When my co-workers bring their dogs to work. :D

Visions

2010-04-15T09:01:00.003-04:00

*Disclaimer: I am a strong believer that the universe is my homegirl and if I stay positive, life will be fantastic. I also believe that Visualization and Manifesting are powerful things to master. And that they work, if you can work them.*

Last Friday, I enrolled at an audio engineering school in New York City. I put forth $100 to commit to attend school again. To commit to my future, my career. It's a big step for someone who has been struggling the past 2 years to figure out what's next. and Since I walked out of that meeting, I've been trying to let myself believe that this is all actually going to happen. That I'm not going through the motions and then a few months from now, something will happen and I'll change my mind. I've made the decision, I've put forth the commitment, My name is on the roster. (the 1st one for September, btw)
The struggle to figure out what else it is that I want is another story. I've figured out the whole career thing for the most part. Now, what else do I want in my life? I just finished reading "Add more ~ing to your life" by Gabrielle Bernstein and have come away with a lot of insight on a lot of things. One thing that she suggested doing, that I've seen time after time is a Vision board. Hell, I bought all the stuff to make one of these things back in December! I just never did. So Sunday, I rearranged some of the frames hanging on my wall and replaced the one over my desk with this square bulletin board that I bought months ago. Gabrielle suggested putting pictures of things you want to attract. Company logos, sayings, pictures that remind you of ideal situations. And she provided examples of her boards consistently working. Enough so that I was inspired enough to let myself finally do it.
Problem was, that besides all the career stuff, I had no idea what to include. I know that I'd like to be married... hopefully within the next 5 years, but I feel uncomfortable making that a "goal". Especially since I've considered myself single for the past 2.5 years. I branched off into things that I'd like in life, but are fairly frivolous. All of it means something to me, and are things that I want, but they aren't "goals" really.
And saying all that feels REALLY silly to me. Because they ARE goals. I realized earlier this week that I stopped letting myself set goals like this 2.5 years ago, when my plans had been crushed one too many times for me to handle. But now these plans and goals are different. They are mine. Just mine. and I can make them happen, and no one can get in the way of it if I don't let them. I have to start to let myself think like this again.
I put together my board on Tuesday night. I sat in front of my computer and asked myself what I want things to be like. And I came up with Pictures of my potential work place, their logo, pictures of The neighborhood that I ultimately want to live in, a unique bridal bouquet, a picture that I see magic and whimsy in, Pictures of cupcakes, roller skates, puppies, and a heart made of veggies. Also, a table full of people that I see as my friends over for dinner, a couple walking through central park holding hands, and a girl buried in a pile of suitcases.
I'm kind of obsessed with this board now.
There are a few empty spaces that still need to be filled, but I think I have the basics on there pretty well. I love it, and this represents how things are going to be.
I just have to let myself believe it.

TiLT

2010-04-08T12:26:00.001-04:00

-Hiking with my BFF "Let's just go to the beach" :)
-1st soft ice cream cone of the year!
-FLIP FLOPS! <3
-Lazy Easter
-Lovely weather
-Buying my plane tickets to LA in July! WOOO!
-Buying my concert tickets to see Backstreet boys in NYC on 6/10! EVEN BIGGER WOOO!!
-Seeing an Olympic silver medal from about 10 ft. away
-Getting wine club wine at work
-The fact that I now own the book "Will Grayson Will Grayson"
-The fact that the past 5-6 things all happened in the same day!!
-Getting enough sleep/ Sleeping with the window open
-Friends!
-Ordering my Purple outdoor wheels for my roller skates
-Robyn's "Fembots"
-Lunch/lunch breaks outside
-My Summer starting to shape up! :D
-About 4 more months until NYC!!!
-House to myself next week!! Yessss!
-Green grass and trees
- www.getonmyhorse.com Endless giggles
-Quiet week at work *phew!*

Sometimes...

2010-04-06T20:49:00.001-04:00

Sometimes I wish too hard that we were better.

TiLT

2010-04-01T14:46:00.001-04:00

-The beautiful weather today!
-Plans to go Hiking with the BFF on Saturday (it's supposed to be like 80degrees out!)
-Buds on trees :)
-Connecting with a dude on OkCupid that I'm actually pretty into...too bad he's 4 hours away from me! :( (for now...)
-The Bravery and She wants Revenge on my iTunes...and also Lights :)
-My new vlog for this week about OkCupid http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FapeZxm0YjI
-Breakfast last weekend with my friend
- Seeing the dude formerly known as "cuteboy" on Saturday and everything going alright. No awkwardness just laughter.
-Shots and B-day cake for a coworker at 11am! haha
-FINALLY buying the purple nail polish I've been drooling over at Sephora
-Considering things that are new to me and not like what I would normally do. Breaking out of my comfort zone a bit.

Love it.

2010-03-31T13:53:00.002-04:00

Carl+Ellie=Love

TiLT

2010-03-25T11:38:00.001-04:00

-Spring Cleaning to the Maxx!
-Not having to wear a coat (even if it was just for a few days)
-Trying out my new Rollerskates!!! And planning on buying my outdoor wheels soon (PURPLE!!!)
-Lunch with 3 of my BFFs from High School
-Resting
-LOVING “add more ~ing to your life” Bit of positive thinking courses inserted into my day
-REALLY long podcast broadcasts. Got talking and couldn’t stop! Love our listeners!
-Making a list of prospective internships for when I move to NYC in August! :) SOO excited!!
-Hearing Passion Pit’s “Little Secrets” on the radio EVERY TIME I was in the car yesterday!!
-The concert prospects for this summer! OkGo (free show!) in May, Kings of Leon in June, And possibly Backstreet Boys also in June??? Exciting! :D

Guilty or Innocent

2010-03-21T15:32:00.002-04:00

Pedro tagged me on Dailybooth, but this is a bit long for a DB Blurb for my tastes, so I'll do it here...

You can only say Guilty or Innocent:

Asked someone to marry you?
Innocent.

Kissed one of your Facebook friends?
Guilty

Danced on a table in a bar?
Innocent.

Ever told a lie?
Guilty.

Had feelings for someone whom you can't have back?
Guilty.

Ever had feelings for your friend's man/woman?
Innocent.

Ever kissed someone of the same sex?
Guilty.

Kissed a picture?
Guilty.

Slept in until 5 PM?
Innocent.

Fallen asleep at work/school?
Guilty.

Held a snake?
Guilty.

Been suspended from school?
Innocent.

Worked at a fast food restaurant?
Innocent.

Stolen from a store?
Innocent.

Been fired from a job?
Guilty.

Done something you regret?
innocent.

Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose?
Guilty.

Caught a snowflake on your tongue?
Guilty.

Sat on a roof top?
Guilty.

Kissed someone you shouldn't?
Innocent.

Sang in the shower?
Guilty

Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on?
A lake. Guilty.

Shaved your head?
Innocent.

Slept naked?
Guilty

Had a boxing membership?
Innocent.

Made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?
Guilty

Been in a band?
Guilty

Donated Blood?
Innocent.

Eaten alligator meat?
Innocent.

Eaten cheesecake?
Guilty.

Have/had a tattoo?
Innocent.

Liked someone, but will never tell who?
Guilty.

Been too honest?
Guilty.

Ruined a surprise?
Innocent.

Ate in a restaurant and got really bloated that you can't walk afterwards?
Guilty.

Erased someone in your friends list?
Guilty.

Dressed in a woman's clothes (if your a guy) or man's clothes (if your a girl)?
Guilty.

Joined a pageant?
Innocent.

Been told that you're handsome or beautiful by someone who totally meant what they said?
Guilty...I guess.

Had communication with your ex?
Guilty. All the time.

Get totally drunk one night and you have an important exam tomorrow morning?
Innocent.

A total stranger treat you by paying your bus fare?
Innocent.

Get totally angry that you cried so hard?
Guilty.

Stolen somebody’s partner?
Innocent.

Made yourself throw up?
Guilty.

Wanted to be someone else?
Guilty. but not for a LONG time.

TiLT

2010-03-19T09:36:00.001-04:00

-Visiting my BFF & her Hubbyface
-My NEW AWESOME SCARF!! (made by BFF) http://dailybooth.com/MimsieSky/3651404
-Seeing Alice in Wonderland
-External Hard Drives coming back from the dead(!!)
-"The Invention of lying" a world where lies don't exist...the thought blows my mind.
-"Pirate Radio" HILARIOUS movie. Added to my 'need to own' list.
-Finishing "Eat Pray Love" and looking forward to the Movie this summer (SOO GOOD!)
-Starting "ADD MORE ~ing TO YOUR LIFE" Pretty interesting so far.
-St. Patrick's day with my co-workers. So much fun!
-Ridiculous ex-boyfriends.
-THIS WEATHER! LOVE ITTT!!!
-Listening to old recordings of my college radio show. Hilarious. I miss it!
-Surprise letters from awesome people far away that make me smile :D
-Street sweepers! They're cleaning the sand off the roads! I can Rollerskate soon!!! :D

Warning

2010-03-17T09:24:00.003-04:00

Black Fence

TiLT

2010-03-12T14:24:00.004-05:00

-Visiting my BFF for the first time since halloween! (YAY!)

-Running 2 miles (again!)

-This video... I had THE BIGGEST smile on my face when I watched it!

-FINALLY covering a song on my channel where I play my own accompaniment!

-My Mesmerizing purple/silver/blue sparkly nails

-Thinking about owning a purple sachel!!

-Making plans to go to a John Green/ David Levithan book signing in NYC on April 11th with a new friend! YAY!

-The scarf that my BFF made me!! I get it tonight!!! :D

-Being productive

-Robot Unicorn Attack and playing it for an hour straight! (that music...just...wow.)

-The Lord of the Rings Themed "Big Bang Theory" episode.... YESSS! :D

-Cleaning out my closet and filling 3 garbage bags of clothes to donate

-"Eat, Pray, Love" by Liz Gilbert Almost done! Fantastic book! :)

-Happy Songs... "All of your life" by The Backstreet Boys and "Little Secrets" by Passion Pit BIG SMILES!

The Grad School Conundrum

2010-03-10T13:32:00.004-05:00

Lately, all my friends are discussing their options in life. Most of which involve going back to school. Logical choice. Get lots of eduction. good.
For a few years now, I've known that I have to go back. I'm not competitive at all with the eduction I received. (Not putting down my education at all. I'm grateful for what I knowledge I have been given and I consider myself a very educated person.) The fact is that my degree path is in a technological field, and I just didn't get the time on the technology to be able to compete. First I was going to go to a video editing school in LA, then an Audio Engineering school in London, and now and Audio engineering school in NYC. When I was deciding what I was going to do when I went back I researched some options.
1) Grad School
2) Technical school

Grad school-
I found 2 programs that could have worked for me. One in Boston and one in NYC. Both very well known schools.
-One I needed a decent reel...of which I didn't have. The other...an essay. I could do that, but to be honest. I would do so kicking and screaming. especially after being out of school for 2 years. These aren't excuses. I know I could have done either. I could have figured it out.
-Next I looked at the prices. I've been lucky in the aspect of financing my education. My parents have told me since I could remember that they would pay for my bachelor's degree. They also paid for my associates (which saved the money because my dad works for the college I went to.) I have no college debt. I'm VERY thankful for that. So when I look to go back to school, I look at the cost. It's on me now. I'm scared of the numbers. Boston school, I've managed to blank out of my mind it was so bad. and the NY school...well, about what most private grad schools cost.
-So I narrow it down to the NY school. I look at the curriculum. Lots of VERY interesting courses, and really good professors. However, none of these classes seem to say that they'll give me what I'm looking for. The practical editing skills. It's all very theoretical. Which leads me to think that maybe I'll be back in the same spot I'm in now in 2 years. I'm not willing to put myself into that much debt and put in that much effort to have that happen.
-2 years. I'm already 26. I know lots of people do grad school later in life, but I want to get my life going. I want to work, and live life, and not worry about papers and tests. I don't want to wait another 2 years! (maybe if I had explored my options 1-2 years ago, I would have had a different opinion.)

Technical School-
I don't really know what to say about this in particular, other than it costs less, takes less time, and will teach me skills. Not theory. it won't test my paper writing ability either.
But it's for a diploma. and I know I could be attending classes with 17/18 year olds. Nothing against them. I was one once, but I know they they don't necessarily know what it's like out there, and may not take this as seriously as I will.
Also, I don't have the instrumental skills that a lot of people that do these programs do. I'm practicing piano again, but it's difficult. I intend to pick the guitar back up when my dad's ear isn't at my door. I do feel like I'm lacking in that sense.

So I chose the tech school (obviously) and I'm excited to learn what I need to learn. However, There's still that voice inside that's going..."Hey! you could do that! Why aren't you?!" I just feel like it's expected from me. and I'm not gonna lie, I would like to say I have a Masters in something. it'd make me happy. Make me feel like I'm worth more, I guess. I just feel like I've been on the "next step" path for a while. High school, Community college, Bachelor's...now what? Most of my peers are choosing Grad School. Maybe i should too?

It just doesn't seem like the logical choice right now.
Maybe I can do an program in a few years, once I've worked. Maybe I won't feel the need after I learn this stuff. Though it scares me to think that maybe I *should* be going to grad school. and frustrates me to no end when everyone tells me I should when It's kind of too late to change my mind. (deadlines have passed and plans have been made for the fall. I'd have to wait another 4 months, something I'm NOT interested in.) I want to. Believe me, I want to. But it just doesn't make sense to me to spend that much time and money on something that might not get me what I'm looking for.

There's just that little doubting voice that sometimes speaks up that hate hearing.

TiLT

2010-03-04T12:16:00.001-05:00

Hmmmm What do I love this week...

-My Roller skates showing up at my door randomly a week ago
-Dinner and wine with a good friend
-Partying down in NYC for a weekend (unexpected and amazing!)
-Going with the flow
-Acceptance to the school I wanted in NYC (FALL 2010!!)
-Navy blue Hunter Rain Boots from ebay (being delivered Today!)
-Magnolia cupcakes and tea in Rockefeller center (!!)
-Shopping in harold Sq. and actually finding things that I love!!
-okcupid and some of the messages I've gotten
-New Friends
-The funny ways the universe works
-My new Subway map on my wall!
-deciding to be at peace with a situation
-Playing a pop song on the piano
-Drunken Texts and Phone calls
-French Toast and Mimosas on a Sunday Morning
-THIS BEAUTIFUL WEATHER! Keep it coming mother nature!
-Free Pizza at bars (WHAT?! Awesome.)
-reconnecting with old friends
-being really excited for the future :)

"'But I love him.' "So love him." 'But I miss him.' "So miss him. Send him some love and light every time you think about him, and then drop it."
-Liz Gilbert "Eat Pray Love"

TiLT

2010-02-25T12:55:00.002-05:00

-My Teddy bear <3
-My Suzuki Aerio (Fantastic in the snow!)
-Twitter and it's Ask-And-Ye-Shall-Receive power
-Communication
-Running 2 miles when I only planned on 1
-Best Friends <3
-Heavy snow on trees
-"I miss you" Texts at 5am
-Company lunches
-Remembering how awesome you are
-Julia Nunes and her Magical Ukulele
-My Podcast...46th episode this week...Holy mother!
-Bathing suit shopping (18 inches of snow be damned!)
-My Bed and it's unending comfort
-Ben and Jerry's Half Baked Ice Cream!!
-Sephora "handpicked for me" Nailpolish

I know what you mean.

2010-02-22T20:08:00.005-05:00

It's hard for me to explain what I feel from time to time any better than song lyrics. I listened to Julia Nunes tonight and felt better after realizing that there is at least one line in most of her songs that I can identify with right now.

"And I'll endure these lonely weeks 'till things get better
And I'll be there for you, until my heart rips in two"

"Well there's only one clock
In this room and it's broken.
Well there's only one heart
In this room and it's stuck at one o'clock."

"But I've just put my anger to good use.
You see I've given up on begging and pleading.
Every scratch on this guitar is because of you."

"Left to my own devices,
I’d stay up till 3 am.
Spend the whole day barely awake,
And then do it all again.
Cause my dreams are filled with pleasantries
That make me think you’re here with me.
They won’t let my poor heart mend.
I have tried my darnedest to continue smiling wide,
But I miss you and that’s something I can’t hide."

"And I've tried hard
To prove that I am strong

See I can talk forever
Except when it counts"

"I'll take ignorance over being so scared
If anyone here wants to die
Give it a shot, you should try
I've been totally desensitized
These eyes have cried all they can cry"

"The dark won't make me sad, though I miss you
I'll make shadow puppets and I'll laugh
Because I know you'd love it
And I'll cry a little too"

"Runnin' down the stairs, I didn't think that I could fall
But gravity took over me and I crumpled like a ball.
But if you would pick me up, I'd be obliged.
Dust me off and push my hair aside."

"You ask me why I'm this way and all I can say is,
I've gone through my fair share of shit"

"They say that pain is the cost of love, of love
I knew it had to happen soon
It just sucks it had to be with you
All the songs I once sang for you
I'll still thing them, though the meaning's you

How Many times can one heart break?"

"'Cause I'm not good at saying things
Especially to you
But it's been awhile and you still make me smile
So I think that I might like you"

"No I won't forget this in a week.
A month. A century.
And I will sing the words that I can't speak
When you're standing right in front of me"

"I'm trying to find a happy medium.
I'm starting to think it isn't here.
If you see me face down with a magnifying glass,
I'm warning you to not come near."

Picture this

2010-02-20T10:54:00.003-05:00

"These streets will make you feel brand new,
the lights will inspire you,
Let's hear it for New York, New York, New York"

Sometimes I have to try really hard to picture myself living in the city. But then I do. and I like what I see.

TiLT

2010-02-18T15:17:00.002-05:00

Alright...time to look on the bright side of life!

-Ordering my Roller Derby Skates-
Riedell She Devils WILL BE MINE! :D

-The Olympics-
I watched Lindsay Vonn and Shaun White last night before I went to bed and it made me SO HAPPY! XD

-Lunch with Coworkers-
I usually eat alone, but when the days roll around that I get to eat with people. It's a good day.

-Sending Friends 'UP!' Valentines-
Elementary school style! But mailed with confetti hearts :)

-My Valentines day Cover song-
And having my exes trying to claim that their picture with me is better than the others! haha

-Recording my own Instrumental Tracks-
Last night I recorded piano parts for a future cover on my YouTube channel! I get giddy when I play them correctly and start giggling, it's difficult! haha

-Dreaming on my move to NYC-
6 More months! :)

The Great Skate Debacle

2010-02-17T11:11:00.005-05:00

I'm not sure how I'm feeling about things right now.
I ordered those Skates I wanted so badly on Friday. As soon as I got my taxes. Happy excited freaking out Cait.
Flash forward to Monday...Still no word on the order. I go to shut my computer down Monday night and I checked my e-mail one more time. Message. "Sorry we don't have those in stock and won't until the end of March. Tell us if you would like to change your order or cancel it."
Um okay pretty pissed off. I look around to check my other options and I sleep on it. Tuesday I wake up and decide the extra bit of money is worth it. I should buy a good pair to use and JUST IN CASE I ever decide to derby it up. I got an e-mail back from the company telling me that I could back order the skates if I wanted to, and to let them know. I told them to go ahead and cancel the order. Okay...so I look around for some deals and to make sure that I'd get the best price on the other ones. Also read some reviews and generally see what the variations on this skate are. I get all set to Order them and double check my bank account. Good thing I did. The original order was charged to my account!!!! WHAT?! YOU DON'T HAVE WHAT I ORDERED! WHY DID YOU TAKE MY MONEY! I flipped out. I wrote an e-mail and when they were finally open, I called them to tell them that I wanted my money refunded ASAP. It was...but it's not posted to my bank account yet. Paypal has a hold on it for a day or two. *sigh* All this trouble.
So needless to say I was SUPER pissed off yesterday at Skates.com/Rollerskates.com. You really shouldn't post that you have something on your website when you, in fact, don't. Rawr! Also in my quest to find new ones, I contacted a local roller rink to see if they had any that I could try out or at least try on. The guy was suggested by the local derby team because they get "deals" so I decided to wait and see if he could get me the model that I wanted for less...or at least without the shipping.
I heard from him a little while ago. Nope. He gets deals on packages...not just skates. So...A little while ago I bought them. And they were more expensive than the others by like $60 and the shipping was like $20...even with the discount. But they are better skates than the others. The boots are better and the wheels are better. I also like the look of the boot a bit more than the others. The laces go all the way to the toe.

Except Mine will have These wheels:

And either Blue or Purple laces. I have to order some. I Bought some purple ones the other day at Hot Topic, but I think they are too short (54"...low-top skate laces are usually 72").
I actually had to force myself to submit the order. anything over $200 makes me think twice...But I'm pretty sure they'll be worth it. The ones I had when I was younger were super beat up and now I'm going to have more freedom in my usage than just the driveway and around the block.
I wasn't as excited when I bought these as I was with the others...but After writing this, I'm actually pretty excited. Hopefully *fingers crossed* there won't be any issues at all with these and I'll get them and they will be awesome.
I can't wait to be back on wheels. :)

Stars

2010-02-12T11:33:00.002-05:00

“Every atom in your body came from a star that exploded. &, the atoms in your left hand probably came from a different star than your right hand. It really is the most poetic thing I know about physics: You are all stardust. You couldn’t be here if stars hadn’t exploded, because the elements -– the carbon, nitrogen, oxygen, iron, all the things that matter for evolution and for life -– weren’t created at the beginning of time. They were created in the nuclear furnaces of stars, & the only way for them to get into your body is if those stars were kind enough to explode. So, forget Jesus. The stars died so that you could be here today.”
(Lawrence Krauss)
via GalaDarling

TiLT

2010-02-11T15:41:00.001-05:00

-Spontaneous movie going
Late at night- Saw Sherlock Holmes, and drank a Pail of soda and rocked in comfy theater seats! really enjoyed the movie!

-Not waking up angry
Having a hell of a time getting up @ 5am to run, I can’t do it. Starting to run after work, Guilt gone.

-ROLLER SKATES/ROLLER DERBY
Um…I’m obsessed. I can’t stop looking at these things! I watched “Whip It” last weekend and I’m mesmerized! Was going to buy traditional Skates with my tax return, am now buying derby skates and pondering the possibility of trying out for the Gotham Girls when I move to NYC! Eep!

-Get together fun with friends
The guy I dated for 3 years in High School just moved back to the area and has his own place with his girlfriend. Party last Sunday night was lovely. I’m glad to have him back. :)

-Lovely unexpected e-mails
Especially first thing in the morning.

-Impulse buying on Etsy
It just happened. and it was awesome.

Oh gosh...here we go...

2010-02-09T13:24:00.009-05:00

Here we go...I've gone and found myself something else to get really really excited about.
A few months ago, while padding my christmas wish list, I came across a really neat looking pair of roller skates. Quadlines.

I thought, WOW. Fantastic! Rollerblade wheels on a quad skate! YES! so from that moment I decided those would be it.
Flash forward to 2 weeks ago when I did my taxes... I finally had some extra cash to get these babies with. Exciting!
Flash forward to this past Sunday... My mom suggested that I watch "Whip It" with her. Rollerskating? Drew Barymore acting and directing? Ellen Page? Yes please! So I sat down to watch this harmless little movie. oh dear, was it not.
Now I'm having grand delusions of joining a Roller Derby League. I mean...about 75% of me is terrified of getting hurt, but the other 25% is REALLY LOUD and SUPER ENTHUSIASTIC about skating and the outfits and the FUN! I am what you call a team player, and I haven't been on a team in ages.
So yesterday out of boredom at work, I looked up to see if there were local leagues.
there are 2. and I cannot stop thinking about the possibility.
Oh lord in heaven.
I'm not saying I'm going to join. but I'm gonna go watch, and I decided today that it might be a good idea to get some skates that, if I do go mentally insane, I could use for that purpose. I mean it's not like they cost $10 or something.
So after a full morning of scouring the interwebs, I have found these:

And since it's winter and I can only skate inside, they are indoor skates, BUT when it gets nicer out, I will purchase some Outdoor wheels, so they are appropriate for wherever I go.
The only problem I'm now having is what color wheels to get. I think it's between pink and ice blue. and of course I'd have to get laces to match. or laces that compliment the bad-assery of them. I'm quite fond of these. if by the end of the week, I still am...I will be happy and the new owner of Riedell 165 Vixen Derby skates. :)

TiLT (on Friday)

2010-02-05T09:40:00.003-05:00

-Dancing for 5 hours with 2 of my favorite guys
Great band, Seedy Bar in my Hometown and dancing until I can barely walk! So good. :)

-Dreaming of my Move to NYC
Fall ’10!!! Savings account open and filling? Check. Craigslist daily research? Check. Studying Audio and mixing in my bit of free time? Check. Searching for possible furniture? Check.

-Rediscovering my love for Opera and Classical music
If you follow my twitter, you know that I went a bit crazy the other night posting songs. I also uploaded most of my Charlotte Church, and another Opera CD that I have. I also purchased "The Magic Flute(Die Zauberflöte)" last night. Oh Mozart, I wish you weren't dead so you could be my Boyfriend.

-My video (vlog or song) every week in 2010 project
So Far so good...5 weeks down 47 more to go!

-accepting situations and making the best of them

-being kind to my vocal cords

-My beautified Moleskine
http://tinyurl.com/yb7h3mc

-Doing my taxes and not owing a SINGLE CENT
And also figuring out what to do with this extra money! So far:
~VidCon Plane Tickets
~Rollerskates
~External Hard drive (since I broke my other one)
~(MAYBE) a Backtreet Boys Fanclub membership (I've wanted one for over 10 years now)
~Put the rest (most of it) into the Operation NYC fund! XD

-Our new twitter non-Lost-watchers club “Found”

-Finding out I had my own Last.FM artist page (!)

-Actually Enjoying the Grammy’s for the 1st time in a while

-Watching The Hangover with my mom (HAHAHA)
Hey, She enjoyed it! I should really buy that movie.

My Friend Hollis, Ladies and Gentlemen...

2010-01-29T23:51:00.003-05:00

H:
ALL THE SINGLE LADIES
ALL THE SINGLE LADIES

H:
what is a Dereon jeans?
is it a brand?

C:
Dereon is Beyonce's line
she does with her mom

H:
hot
somehow seems sleazy to sing about your own jeans line

C:
she fit it in well

H:
probably difficult
evidently they're quite tight

C:
....I meant into the song
wow
you're ridiculous

H:
although on the song scale of tightness
dereon jeans are less tight than men

C:
hahaha

H:
or A man
and given that "tight" used to be a synonym for drunk
we can infer that, in the club where Beyonce is dancing, the men are more alcohol- enhanced than her jeans are, indicating that she is coordinated and tends not to spill her drink on herself.

C:
wowww

H:
Knowles's work can, therefore, be seen as a cautionary admonition to young women everywhere, warning them of the need for cautious and sober social engagements.
In addition, the repeated refrain "If you liked it / then you shoulda put a ring on it" underscores the continued relevance of traditional morals in today's fallen society.
Knowles refuses to spend her life with a man who wants to milk the cow without purchasing; by explaining that he "should put a ring on it", she leads all young women to reject premarital intercourse and shows them that chastity has continued relevance in today's world.
The song's undercurrent of individualism strengthens this theme of traditional values, given that it touts the virtue of "doin' [one's own] little thing" and states that Knowles "couldn't care less what you think".
Moreover, she advises young women to be kind to their beaus, understanding their hormonal impulses: "don't be mad when you see that he wants it". Sexual impulses are normal, but prosecuting them outside the playing field of marriage is a personal foul. Beyonce speaks for all women by recognizing the helplessness men feel toward their sexual natures, but she reiterates that "if you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it". This stern, forbidding woman has needs of her own, and she makes it clear that her paramour must jump through hoops (of gold) if he is to win her heart.
Moving through her life with the continuing refrain, Beyonce issues a call to arms to all her handmaidens: although she began with "doing [her] own little thing", she closes with repeated entreaties to "all the single ladies", exhorting them to put their (un-ringed) hands up. Echoing the strains of Lysistrata, she calls the Sisterhood to unite in purity and unity of purpose, rejecting premarital sex and strengthening the bonds of matrimony.

Make it happen

2010-01-26T13:00:00.003-05:00

My mom once told me that her favorite thing about me is when I want to do something badly enough, I make it happen.
I've been having trouble saving money the past few months, but now is the time to catch up. Today I opened a Savings account and transferred over $100. I also have Christmas money sitting at home, waiting for a nice account to settle down in. From now on, I'm putting away AT LEAST $300 every month for New York. I have 6-7 months to save. I'm watching what I spend daily on Lunch (I've paid upwards of $10 some days) I try to spend less than $5 a day. I would bring my lunch, but I need to get away from my desk, so something inexpensive at the coffee shop will do. I'm not allowed to just go buy things anymore. I go to target for one thing and end up with 10 a bit too often. What I NEED and only what I NEED. Also, Tax season is coming up, and The government has taken an assload from every paycheck, so all of the tax money (except maybe some money for rollerskates [yes. I am 7.]) will be deposited into savings.
I was laying in bed last night thinking about what my mom told me a few years back. She's right. It's a challenge that I'm ready and want to complete.
I'm getting excited and starting to make things happen.

2010-01-25T15:15:00.002-05:00

KissTheGroom

"I would bake a chocolate cake for you with tiers up to the moon..."

Dear 2010

2010-01-22T13:03:00.006-05:00

Picture from the "Year in Yes" Calender from Yes and Yes
Dear 2010,
Hello! I know I'm a little late in welcoming you, but better late then never, right?
2009 was a busy year, it had it's good parts and bad parts. I expected a lot out of 2009 but unfortunately it just didn't deliver. I mean, don't get me wrong, 2009 was a decent year. I just don't think we were meant to be.
I know you and I are only about 3 weeks in, but So far, you're not looking as fabulous as I had hoped. I mean, there's definitely potential, but I'm not getting the kind of results I would prefer right now.
So I figure I should just lay it all out on the table and let you know what I expect from you. I know you can't read my mind like I wish you could, so let's just run through how this is gonna go.
2010 will be a year of (in no particular order):
-Happiness
-Learning
-socializing
-loving
-Focus
-dancing
-running
-hard work
-relaxing
-discipline
-video making
-roller skating
-moving
-smiling
-visiting
-bravery
-strength
-Kindness
-Responsibility
-and Magic

I expect every single one of these things out of you.
We're in this together, and if we can't work as a team, you'll go down the exact crazy way that 2009 did. And we don't want that, do we? I know I don't. Let's learn from 2009 and every other year in this lifetime before that.
So take this weekend, get your head together, and really figure it all out. Then we'll give it another go. I have faith that you are THE YEAR.

With lots of Love and adoration,
Cait

TiLT

2010-01-22T08:38:00.004-05:00

Anyone recognize this ^???

-Getting organized at work

-Lady Gaga
I've finally come around..She's AWESOME! I can't stop listening to "Telephone" and "teeth" ohhhh dearrr

-No more Wonky heart
It doesn't feel like I'm having a low grade panic attack anymore! Horray!

-My video project
Last night's video wasn't the best...but I said A video every week...not a GOOD video every week! haha :)

-Thinking about my Visit to California in July
Ohh Vidcon I'm so excited for you...and the beach. :)

-The softest Blanket in the world
It's purple and you're jealous. :)

-Sending surprise packages

-Looking at craigslist to try and figure out living situations in NYC in Sept! :)
Probably gonna be a shared 1br or studio or worse comes to worse, shared large room in a shared house...

-Roomies!

-Dance Parties
Random ones are the best!

-Best friends making you laugh til you cry
Even if it is out of pure exhaustion...it's still funny :)

-The fastest Shopping spree ever!
$177 at H&M in less than an hour

-Smiling

2010-01-20T11:26:00.004-05:00

I don't wanna think anymore
I left my head and my heart on the dance floor.

I just want to dance in a crowded room to loud music for hours lately.

TiLT

2010-01-14T16:55:00.002-05:00

Boy do I need this bit of positivity today!

-2010 Video every week project!:
Last week I started my make a video every week project (here: http://www.youtube.com/MimsieSky) Last week it was a vlog, this week it will be a music video. I'm excited! :) It gives me something to create every week. Feels good.

-Mini Year in yes calender:
I made a mini version of the Year in Yes calender from Yesandyes.org for my desk at work...it's SO CUTE!

-Bunnysoft Blankets:
I bought the world's softest blanket at TJMaxx a few weeks ago, and it has been my savior this week!

-My Teddy Bear:
I have this Indian Teddy bear that is VERY well loved and I've had for YEARS. She usually sits on the side of my bed, but she's been my cuddle buddy this week.

-Clinique Even better lotion:
My mom got this stuff, and I've used it twice and already my skin tone (including acne scars) has evened out! HORRAY!!!

-OK Go "Of the Blue Colour of the sky":
I love these guys and this album is awesome! I especially love their new Marching band video version of "This too shall pass" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UJKythlXAIY

-Hope:
When shitty things happen, I find hope. Hope has been my friend lately.

-The ability to smile again: Rough beginning to the week, Today I've been able to smile quite easily. I'm glad :)

Many The Miles

2010-01-06T10:16:00.000-05:00

"There's too many things that I haven't done yet
Too many sunsets
I haven't seen
You can't waste the day wishing it'd slow down
You would've thought by now
I'd have learned something

I made up my mind when I was a young girl
I've been given this one world
I won't worry it away
But now and again I lose sight of the good life
I get stuck in a low light
But then Love comes in

How far do I have to go to get to you
Many the miles
Many the miles
How far do I have to go to get to you
Many the miles
But send me the miles and I'll be happy to follow you Love

I do what I can wherever I end up
To keep giving my good love
And spreading it around
Cause I've had my fair share of take care and goodbyes
I've learned how to cry
And I'm better for that

Sing how far do I have to go to get to you
Many the miles
Many the miles
How far do I have to go to get to you
Many the miles
Send me the miles and I'll be happy to
Follow you Love

Red letter day and I'm in a blue mood
Wishing that blue would just carry me away
I've been talking to God don't know
If it's helping or not
But surely something has got to got to got to give
Cause I can't keep waiting to live

How far do I have to go to get to you
Many the miles
Many the miles
How far do I have to go to get to you
Many the miles
But send me the miles and I'll be happy to yeah
How far do I have to go to get to you
Many the miles
Many the miles
How far do I have to go to get to you
Many the miles
Many the miles
Been talking to God don't know if it's helping or not
Many the miles
Many the miles
How far do I have to go to get to you
Many the miles
Many the miles
Oh send me the miles and I'll be happy to
Follow you Love

There's too many things I haven't done yet
Too many sunsets I haven't seen"

-Sara Bareilles

Haha ohh dear!

2010-01-05T11:59:00.002-05:00

2009 Survey

2010-01-02T14:48:00.003-05:00

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?
Was a Maid of Honor, Worked a job for 7 consecutive months, Played Golf.

2. Did you keep your New Year’s Resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Move to California
Eat healthy
Work out more
Find a job

Well the first one I sucked at. but I dropped that one on purpose very soon after I made it. The others I think I did a better job at. I don't think I gained more weight this year than I did last year, so that's a step in the right direction.
And I'm making changes in my life, but not resolutions. It'd just be silly to make resolutions.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Nope.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No. Thank goodness.

5. What countries did you visit?
England :)

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
My own apartment, Focus, a puppy....I don't know.

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Well...I don't know the exact dates, but things that happened. Ally and Dan's wedding related stuff...The shower, the bachlorette party, The wedding, The Belfast Party... Going to LI for the No Doubt concert. Best of my life. My first official YouTube gathering. Going to London on my own. This year really was pretty jam-packed!

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
My happiness, and recognizing the things in my life that had been standing in the way of that. Also my job, my podcast...oh and winning the golf tournament was pretty cool :)

9. What was your biggest failure?
The lack of working out for a while. and lack of video making.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Not really *knock on wood* a few bumps, scratches, and splinters here and there, but nothing big.

11. What was the best thing someone bought you?
I think my bridesmaid presents were pretty awesome.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Ally and Sara of Course! and my parents for putting up with me another year.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Same as usual.

14. Where did most of your money go?
The Wedding and Trip to London. But that's all paid back! :)

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Paying off my credit card...Meeting a cute boy...

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?
Last.fm says my top songs of the year were:
(besides the garden state soundtrack because I listened to that on my ipod every night)
1. Circus- Britney Spears
2. Danity Kane- Pretty boy
3. Girls Aloud- Something kinda Ooh
4. Run DMC- Walk this way
5. Dragonette- Fixin to thrill
6. DMB- Everyday
7. Julia Nunes- Pen to paper
8. Julia Nunes- Happy Medium
9. Julia Nunes- First impressions
10. Julia Nunes- Odd

Interesting because the 1st two are on my workout playlist and 3-6 are on my stretch playlist...so I guess if you get rid of those...just a hell of a lot of JuNu! haha

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? The Happier
b) fatter or skinner? a bit skinnier
c) richer or poorer? Well I actually have a job now, so..richer. :)

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Video making

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Being lazy

20. How do you plan to spend Christmas?
I spent it at home with my parents playing with my Mic and my new DVD player. :)

21. Did you fall in love in 2009?
On my way by the end of it. :)

22. How many one night stands?
Zip!

23. What was your favorite TV program?
Big Bang Theory, The Secret Life of the American Teenager, Law and Order (as usual)

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Not really. I don't actually HATE anyone...but I've released the less desired people in my life.

25. What was the best book you read?
The Red Book by Sera Beak.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Julia Nunes

27. What did you want and get?
I'm happy with what I did get...I don't know if it was what I wanted. But I'm happy.

28. What did you want and not get?
My own place. But it'll come to me when the universe thinks I'm ready for it. Just like everything else.

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
"Up"

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 26 and chilled out at my house. The weekend before I went out with friends :)

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Moving out of my house. Not dealing with Boy crap.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
Comfy, Cute in my free time- Business casual boring at work.

33. What kept you sane?
Remembering to breathe and my friends

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Meh...no one really.

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
I don't know if there really was one...but the run at all the Gay Marriage laws really upset me.

36. Who do you miss?
Currently? Ally...Denise...Drake
Usually...The boy

37. Who was the best new person you met?
The boy, Sidney, JP, Alex... a lot of YT peeps.

38. What was the best thing you ate?
Geeze I don't even remember! Prolly all the pret a manger I had in London or OH! The dinner at Ally and Dan's wedding was DELISH!

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009?
Trust your gut. And also how to cut unhealthy people from my life.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
Can't really put it all in a single song lyric. too much.

Screw "I'll never..."

2009-12-29T22:10:00.006-05:00

Start thinking "I'll Always..."

In a relationship I'll always....

1) Be 100% Trustworthy and Trust 100%

2) Laugh...a lot.

3) Be open. With myself, and to new things.

4) Kiss and Hug as often as I can

5) Share inside jokes

6) Challenge and let myself be challenged

7) Take a joke.

8) Be independent and give independence.

9) Listen. No matter what.

10) Say how I feel even if it's scary.

11) Care about who and what he cares about.

12) Be Thoughtful.

13) Be myself, no matter what part of my self decides to show its' face on that particular day.

14) Compromise.

15) Share.

I can't say I've done all of these in the past,
but I resolve that I will always do these things in the present and future.

(inspired by: http://www.thefrisky.com/post/246-girl-talk-instead-of-ill-never-heres-what-ill-always-do-in-a-relationsh/#When:18:30:48Z?eref=RSS)

Oprah is gonna get Pwned!

2009-12-29T12:54:00.002-05:00

As per Alan's request I told Oprah she should have John and Hank on the show. Here's what I wrote... (seemed a shame to waste it all on the form)

My life was changed by a pair of brothers.
During the summer of 2007 I started watching videos on a website called Brotherhood 2.0 (Brotherhood2.com). John and Hank Green decided to contact each other without the use of text for an entire year. In the process John and Hank started an internet revolution. I was in my last semester in college, and had lost my identity in a really awful relationship. Watching these two interact reminded me of who I was and what I stood for. Not only were they Nerds, but they were PROUD of being who they were. When I graduated in December, I moved back in with my parents and started my Online life. I was part of a vlogging project modeled after B2.0 and met people from around the world. I also started chatting and interacting with other people. Now because of this, I work for a successful and award winning Record company Co-owned by Hank Green. Every week I produce, record, edit, and broadcast a podcast for the people who have also had their lives changed by these two.
John and Hank started their project so that they can get to know each other better, but have become roll models and leaders of a group of people (known as Nerdfighters) who have gotten to know themselves better. not only this, but they bring light to environmental issues (Hank is a eco technology blogger at ecogeek.com), Current events, literature (John is an award winning Young Adult writer) and encourage others to participate in Charity with their annual PROJECT FOR AWESOME.
Please invite John and Hank on the show to talk about their story. It's fantastic and they're very intelligent and funny guys!
oh and also, they have more subscribers than Oprah on YouTube and were very excited to have "pwned" (or beat) Oprah. :)

TiLT

2009-12-24T16:32:00.002-05:00

-Gifting:
Thinking about it, I've gotten lots of gifts for people this year. Struck randomly yesterday to get my parents something ELSE for Christmas made me very happy to shop yesterday. :)

-Christmas Bonus:
I. Love. My. Bosses. I can now pay off my Credit card, buy a new straightener and still have money to put away for NYC next year! Yessss!!!!

-Secret Santa:
My friends on NFI and I do a Secret Santa every year. I opened mine yesterday that came from my friend in Spain and got this: http://dailybooth.com/MimsieSky/2249312 also a MASSIVE YUMMY chocolate bar and a Spanish mixed CD!! It has made the past 24 hours quite lovely!

-Pandora Christmas Playlists:
I Type in "All I want for Christmas is you" and I get the best Christmas Playlist ever! I've been listening for the past 2 days! wee!

-Vlog Plans:
I decided the other day, that I'm going to try and do a weekly vlog for my YouTube channel next year. It will be centered around TilT, but also news and goings on of the week. Still planning it a bit, but I'm excited! :)

-GLITTER:
I know this should be a given every week, but I got some stuff from Sephora in the mail the other day and it includes a silver glitter pot and some Glittery nail polish That's blue, Purple, and Red!! It's SOO PRETTYYY!!! I was so happy to get this package! haha

-Plotting for next year:
Lots happening next year. Planning things little by little and starting to get excited. :)

What I need...

2009-12-21T10:50:00.000-05:00

I feel like what I need right now, is a warm breeze and a hammock.

Things I Love Thursday!

2009-12-17T12:49:00.003-05:00

-Amazing weekends:
Cuteboy, Best Friends, Drinks, Sushi, Cupcakes, Dancing, Free dinner at my favorite restaurant, and 2 nights in my very own HUGE AND COMFY hotel room with an amazing boy!

-YouTube Gatherings:
Last week I mentioned VidCon (www.vidcon2010.com) and then Monday I got a Mini gathering in NYC with 9 other YouTubers. It was well worth the 8 hours of travel! Love my Internet peeps!

-BEST ONLINE RECORD LABEL AWARD!!:
DFTBA Records, the tiny Label I work for, just won Best Online Record Label from Mashable.com!!! Um…We were up against 50 Cent’s Label!!! YESSSSS!!! Love Love Love

-Planning a ‘Me’ Day for my 26th Birthday:
Moved the party to the weekend before, so now I have to make plans for spending my B-day on my own. So far plans are a Pixar Mini Marathon featuring “Monsters Inc.” “Finding Nemo” and “Wall-E”, My favorite kinds of food from Local shops/restaurants, and of course a fun soundtrack all day long. :)

-Cuteboy:
Even though I get frustrated a lot with the whole situation, I’m really learning to let myself go with someone again. It feels really good to have that after being single and too scared for 2 years. He makes me smile so much!

-Catching up on sleep and reading:
Work has been Chaos lately. I’m excited to catch up this weekend and over Christmas and new years. Hopefully it’ll all calm down with 2010.

Yes it is.

2009-12-10T11:05:00.001-05:00

Colormekristen gives me distractions (& hugs)

2009-11-19T09:35:00.002-05:00

Alphabet Survey meme thing...

A
- Available: In Theory yes...but not really.
- Age: 25 (26 in a month! eep!)
- Annoyances: Cockiness, Slow drivers, dirty fingernails.
- Afternoons or mornings: Afternoons...if I had it my way, I'd never see mornings.

B
- Best Friend: Ally and Sara...then Eric haha
- Beer: Yuck.
- Birthday: December 20th
- Best month: May, June, July, September...and I guess Maybe December...but not for the weather.
- Best day: Saturdays...Thursdays are also pretty cool.

C
- Crush: I haz one.
- Candy: Chocolate, Caramel, Nougat stuff...Things with Peanut butter...and NERDS(Ropes)!
- Colour: Blue, Purple, Green
- Chocolate or Vanilla: Depends on my mood.
- Criminal Record: zip.

D
- Day or Night: Night!
- Dream Vehicle: Mini Cooper
- Dream: To be happy and enjoy life :)

E
- Easiest Person To Talk To: Sara I think...
- Eggs: Easy over medium with rye toast, plz thx.
- End of the line: kinda sucks, unless there's like 3 people.

F
- First Crush: Is a massive Douchbag and I recall him being nice to me once. in 3rd grade.
- Fuck vs Feck: FUCK!!
- Fave piece of clothing: Comfy pants or a hoodie :)
- Fave song atm: I really like "Fireflies" by Owl City also The Asteroids Galaxy Tour is pretty cool :)
- Future: Work another 9ish months, Move to NYC, Go to school for Audio engineering...then hopefully acquire a job in the field! Dunno after that.

G
- Gummy Bears or Gummy Worms: Gummy Worms!! :)
- Giver or Taker: I'm a giver...but if someone gives to me, I'm happy to be a taker! :)
- Greatest moment in life: Figuring out I am where I'm supposed to be at that moment.
- Gold or Silver: Silver! :)

H
- Hair: Dyed blond and straightened... it's a pain in the ass.
- Happy: What I want to be always. :)
- Hat: I like them, but don't wear them often...
- Hugs: Horray! :)

I
- Ice Cream: Ben and Jerry's is usually a safe bet...or Edy's! YUM!
- Instrument: Voice! :)
- Is there anything you would tell yourself 3 years ago: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND ALL THE IS HOLY DO NOT MOVE IN WITH HIM!!!!!!
- Invisible for a Day: Might be interesting...but only if I could teleport...otherwise it's pretty useless here.

J
- Jewellry : 3 rings, small hoop earrings, and a necklace...every day.
- Job: Receptionist/Admin. Assistant. Not bad...for now.
- Jeans: The dark blue ones that I'm wearing now. :)

K
- Kids: 2 or 3 at some point...possibly in 5-10 years...depending on the circumstances
- King for the day: I'd declare my birthday national bear hug day. (Oh! good idea Kristen!)

L
- Lie ins: PLEASE!! My favorite thing. :)
- Longest Car Ride: Rode with my family to Colorado and back when I was 11
- Life: Is pretty decent.

M
- Milk Flavor: Chocolate?
- Music: All Kinds and lots of it!

N
- Number Of Siblings: 1
- Number : 20
- Note to self: Don't forget to get those things done later....

O
- One Wish: That I could actually save a good amount of money in the next year...
- One Phobia: falling
- One song: can't do it.
- One love: Let's get together and feeeel allllright!

P
- Part Of Your Personality That You Like: I'm fun :)
- Physical Feature on yourself you like: My smile...and my hair (even if it's a pain in the ass)
- Physical Feature on opposite sex you like: For some reason I really like noses... also eyes and hair..but noses...yeah.

Q
- Quick or Slow: depending
- Queen for the day: I'd buy a really awesome wardrobe and declare every Monday Hug day! :)

R
Reason 2 Smile: Today is my friday...I have my 1st official personal day off tomorrow!
Reason 2 Cry: I wish we could be closer.
Rolos vs Refreshers: OMG. I LOVE ROLOS...

S
Song You Last Heard: Something on the radio...not sure what though.
Song You Are Hearing: People talking and some beeping...also me typing.

T
- Tattoo: Still contemplating a star on my wrist or hip...still kinda chicken
- Time Now: 10:01am
- Time For Bed: Lately between the hours of 11&1...too late.
- Time of Birth: I think it was like 7:30ish in the am...
- Treat: Brownies...cupcakes...cheesecake...oh man.

U
- Useless: my left hand.
- Unusual: Me, behind closed doors...
- Umbrella or hood: Depends on how hard it's raining.

V
- Vegetable You Hate: Raw Onion, Brussel Sprouts
- Vegetable You Love: Spinach, Carrots, Avacados
- Vertigo: Kinda scares me a little.

W
- Worst Habits: I'm kinda messy
- Worst Day: I've had a few pretty awful ones.
- Worst Person: I don't really associate with people that would qualify
- Worst thing you own: Why would I own it?
- Why?: Do you only ask "worsts" for W??

X
- X-Rays: Are pretty cool, but I haven't had one in ages.
- Xylophone: Sound pretty when played correctly :)

Y
- Year It Is Now: 2009
- Yellow: Some shades of it a pretty awesome :)

Z
- Zoo Animal: Hippos!
- Zodiac Sign: Sagg/Capricorn Cusp...but Technically Sagg. :)

Close your eyes

2009-11-07T23:07:00.002-05:00

Playlist meant to be consumed with headphones and closed eyes.
(in no particular order)

1)Faust Arp- Radiohead
2)Fingertips- Emiliana Torrini
3)Keep Breathing- Ingrid Michaelson
4)In the Waiting Line- Zero 7
5)Stars- The Weepies
6)Bedshaped- Keane
7)Lullaby- Newton Faulkner
8)Lullaby- Josh Groban Feat. Ladysmith Black Mambazo
9)Fix You- Coldplay
10)Biko- Peter Gabriel
11)Chocolate- Snow Patrol
12)Autumn- Paolo Nutini
13) #3- Matt Pond
14)Fireflies- Owl City
15)Spitting Games- Snow Patrol
16)Stay Positive- The Streets
17)Hide and Seek- Imogen Heap
18)Wait- Alexi Murdoch
19)Lengthwise- Phish
20)Let Go- Frou Frou
21)Neon- John Mayer
22)Hamburg Song- Keane
23)Brothers on a Hotel Bed- Death Cab for Cutie
24)Now and Always- David Gray
25)15 step- Radiohead
26) You could be Happy- Snow Patrol
27)Undisclosed Desires- Muse
28)Teardrops- Massive Attack
29)New Slang- The Shins
30)Kissing you- Des'ree

Yup.

2009-11-06T11:19:00.001-05:00

I know that i know nothing

2009-10-26T10:44:00.002-04:00

I've been back from England for just over a week.
It was a good trip that I got a lot out of.
1) He and I are totally done. nothing unfinished nothing there but a good friend.
2) It's just not worth it to me.
3) Home was home back then.
4) Look forward.

Why spend all that time and money and stress trying to get myself to somewhere that was home for me once, but not quite so anymore. The whole time I was there, I just wanted to be here. Maybe it's a "grass is greener..." kinda thing? sort of?
I do feel more at home here, and not as ashamed of my country as I was 4 years ago. I feel like there is something here for me, now.
Though saying that I'm back to what I'm going to end up doing. School in NYC seems most likely. but now I have to decide, 1 year or 2? Certificate or Masters? A lot of money or a Ton of money? Where to after that?
I have absolutely no idea. But somehow, don't feel rushed right now to figure it all out.

This weekend I went up to Potsdam, and it was really nice. I hadn't seen Pat in very close to 3 weeks. We hung out, at pizza, watched Always sunny in Philadelphia and Futurama, Had lunch with 1 of his friends who was in town, napped, played on our computers, showed off pictures from our recent trips, Shared silly videos of friends, listened to music, ate yummy things, and Played with the insane cat. A nice weekend. I'm excited for another at some point.
I also realized that I had something else on my "Work on Cait" list. Which I had never really thought about, but now that I've recognized it, I shall hopefully fix that like all the other crap I've been working on for the past 2 years. haha
My Sunday night was quite gloomy though... it may have been the lack of sleep.. or my remembering the suckage of the situation.
But I'm back to work, and things are okay.
All is well.
Sleep, eat, work, repeat.

Occupation

2009-09-23T13:28:00.003-04:00

A while back someone remarked on how many jobs I've held in my 25 years I just started listing them in my head and needed to see it written out.
so here we go:

1999-Present

Lifeguard
Sales Associate- Record Town
Kiddie Rides Operator- Six Flags
Summer Camp Counselor
Sales Associate- FYE (formerly Record Town)
Day Care Assistant
Shop Girl- Miss Selfridge
Assistant Manager- Onara
Day Camp Counselor
Web Director- WFNP The Edge
Web Coordinator- WNPC TV
Usher- Saratoga Race Track
Traffic Director- WFNP The Edge
Sales Associate- Forever 21
Promotional Team Member- Clear Channel Radio Poughkeepsie
Transcriptionist
Promotional Team Member- Fly92
Production Assistant- ESPN
Office Manager
Podcast Host
Cocktail Waitress
Receptionist/Admin. Assistant

Jobs left out/ Reason:
Steve and Barry (sales)/ Worked @ 1 day
Admin Assist. @ plumbing and heating co./ Worked total of 14 hrs.

Wow. That is way more than I feel like it should be!
Some of those jobs I held at the same time, and some of them I had for a while... Crazy stuff! that's all my jobs in 10 years!!

Love this...

2009-09-18T20:21:00.006-04:00

The Universe is my homeboy

2009-09-15T22:28:00.002-04:00

I'm so happy that this year I'm really learning to go with things.
That I'm learning to hear what is going on around me.
though I'm not liking these little unsure periods in my life lately.
Since my last entry, the idea of NYC has been growing on me. Really. I'm barely thinking about London. it's SO WEIRD.
I'm excited that I'm going to London in a little over 3 weeks, but I'm not thinking about it constantly like I thought I would be.
And maybe it's just this week or the past few days.
Maybe it's because I'm a little bummed about the money thing for school and I'm just starting to come around to being able to actually afford going someplace without all the ridiculous hassle.
There is also someone that is showing up in my life that is interesting to me. I've managed thus far to think of all new guys that I've met as just a friend or whatever, but this one is different. I'm curious about him. very curious.
and out of my curiosity today I found that the universe and stars say that we could probably be really good. which leads me to be even MORE curious.
At the same time I'm still cautious, as I've learned to be.
But I'm following what direction I'm being pointed in, and listening to what is going on around me. Even though at the moment I'm majorly in Limbo and feeling a bit confused, I'm still feeling fairly happy and content with how things are.
I guess it's just more thinking and seeing how things are when I get back from London. Though no decisions need to be made about anything right now, I have a while. and for someone that needs to know what is going to happen, it's kinda strange. but I'm feeling quite okay with that right now.
We'll just see what October has in store. The forecast is for an interesting month. :)

The concept of Home

2009-09-11T12:56:00.003-04:00

The past few days I've been doing more school research.
My upcoming trip will include a visit to a school that I've been drooling over for the past 7 months (Alchemea). Yesterday, I decided that I would also visit it's competitor. It's competitor (SAE Institute) has schools all over the world. It's pretty well known. While searching around their site, I looked up what schools were available in the US. Lo and Behold there is one in NYC. So I start planning a backup. There is also this really cool place called "dubspot" that I randomly found out about on Facebook. It's basically a DJ school. It looks like a neat place. Also in NYC. If things didn't work out they way I'd like for London, I'd probably head to NYC. That's always been the backup in my mind, I was just never sure of the school thing.
So that lead me to today, researching Alchemea more. Then re-reading the visa stuff and discovering that I have to have the funds in my bank account in order to get my Visa at the time of application.... months before I would start. #Plancrashburn I'm not sure if the financial stuff for SAE London is the same as Alchemea...but if it is, again... #Plancrashburn
So now I'm left coming to terms with the NYC plan.
ugh.
1) Expensive school...more so than Alchemea even with the exchange.
2) Expensive living...I searched for Studios, cheapest I found was $1400. Ick.
3) I'm not all that crazy about the idea of living in NYC. I love visiting, but I always enjoy the fact that I can go home at the end of the day.
4) I don't really have a whole lot of friends down that way. I mean, I do, but not that I'm in constant touch with.
5) I don't feel a sense of "ME" there. And maybe that's just because I haven't lived there before, but it doesn't seem to fit right.

The only upside of the whole situation is I don't have to deal with Visa crap and they accept Sallie Mae loans. Also, I'll still be close to my Best friends, who I would feel devastatingly sad to have to leave.

The big thing about the 2 choices is the feeling of where I belong. I feel deep down that I BELONG in London. I feel like I fit there. I've been to NYC a million times and I still just feel like I'm visiting.
I can see myself carving out a good life in London...
I can see myself continuing along the same path I'm on in NYC.

I guess all I can do at this point is take a tour of both places, see how London feels 4 years later, and then, if things are working positively, figure it all out.
if not, then I know I have another route.

Running as fast as we can...

2009-08-21T10:24:00.003-04:00

It's funny how when you exercise your mind clears and works better.
not necessarily all the time, because you exercise, but WHILE you are. I've had so many personal epiphanies while I've run it's ridiculous.
This morning I was running and a song came on that I've heard and sang along with a MILLION times, and I got it.

"That's what you get when you let your heart win, whoa.
I drowned out all my sense with the sound of its beating.
And that's what you get when you let your heart win, whoa."

It's good to know I'm not the only one. haha

Do exercise epiphanies happen to anyone else?

Smart Lady

2009-08-19T16:27:00.001-04:00

I was texting with Ally the other day, and she gave me this quote:

"I like to look forward to the future & never to the past- life is up and down- what can you do?" -Donatella Versace

Maybe I could just do what would make me happy and just trust in fate.
Maybe I should trust myself a little more than I have, and remember what I'm doing.

MEGA BUDGET

2009-08-03T12:59:00.004-04:00

After thinking I might not have to pay for my flight on my trip to London in 2 months (hopefully), and finding out that wasn't happening, I felt better getting organized and knowing what I have to do to make the trip happen. Here's how it panned out:

(Financial Info is Censored, All totals and exchange rates are Approx)

Idea

2009-07-23T18:43:00.002-04:00

I'm thinking about doing a series of Cover songs on my YT... a random thought that came to me while I was getting ready for work the other day and has stuck in my brain ever since....
I'm gonna call them the Ex-Files (original I know)...
but songs remind me of people and places, especially people I've been in relationships with so my idea is to do a video that reminds me of the beginning and the end of every relationship I've had. I'm not gonna match them up, just do them in random order there will be probably 8 songs. Possibly 10 if I can think of some songs for one... I have to put some thought and remembering into it. then people can guess which ones go with eachother.... so it'll be like something for me AND my subscribers! and it'll get me making videos...though I'm still a little worried about the whole, looking the same aspect. I'll have to try to make each one a bit different.
What do you think?

Music

2009-07-21T09:05:00.005-04:00

Great title, eh? Thought of it myself.

I have been thinking a lot recently about Music in my life. What role it has taken and what role I want it to take.
Music, in my life has been a way of venting. When I'm sad or upset about something, I turn to a song that either has the right melody for me to get my energy out or the right lyrics to relate to and realize that I'm not alone in what I was feeling. Also to express how I was feeling to other people (seriously, I used to write out song lyrics and slide them under my parent's door when I was upset with them). or if I'm happy or lovey or goofy or mellow, the appropriate song has been right there with me. I've always taken a very reactionary and interpretive role with music. Even on my YouTube, it's my interpretations of a song that someone else wrote.
As much as I've taken this role, this is not necessarily the role that I want.
Every so often I get pumped up enough to try to write something of my own, but whatever I come up with is laden with cliches and similes, one right after the other. I get frustrated, and come up with the conclusion that I just can't do it. wait a few months, or a year, repeat.
I try to learn an instrument...I took Piano lessons for 5 years and then a semester in College... what do I retain from that? a very rudimentary version of "ode to joy". Piano combined with 10 years of Flute lessons did teach me to read and understand music. I know what sheet music says. Even then, I'm a horrible sight reader and often learn things slowly and memorize them and then speed it up. I struggled with Flute for all 10 years because of this (last chair in band!).
I'm still surprised to this day that I have a degree in music. Sure I excelled at the performance part, but trying other instruments and the theory...how did I get through that?! Recently, when I've tried to learn guitar, it's incredibly difficult for me to read the music, so I memorize what I'm given. and I can't seem to keep up with it. I go for a month or so and then for some reason stop. Stop lessons, stop practicing...
There have been a few times when I wrote something that I liked... In my last stage of Theory, we used Sibelius and I wrote a few classical pieces that were decent (nothing compared to the amazingness of some of my classmates though) and I took a few Music Classes at New Paltz where we had to write some lyrics for a traditional Blues song. I did this for 3 different classes I think, and the ones I wrote for the last 2 were pretty good. I was proud. I even recorded it to hand in with the lyrics. but that's as far as I've ever gotten.
Lately, I've been hearing things that are a bit motivating but I've been kind of brushing them aside.
When I sing in BlogTV after DFTBA radio, people really enjoy it and one day someone I respect musically and as a person (of course) said that I was "really going places". and the other day I got a very nice e-mail (I don't get many) and the guy said I was either having fun doing what I was doing, or I'm poised for something big. and there have been a few instances when people tell me "when You're rich a famous" rich and famous for what?! I feel like if only I could just write SOMETHING be able to play my own stuff....maybe they would be right. and it's one of the most frustrating feelings in the world. I just never know where to start.
Also, I've been dying to collaborate with people...if I can't do my own stuff, I'd love to help other people with theirs. There is one possibly in the works, but I haven't heard anything about it in a few weeks, so I don't know what's going on with that. Maybe the vast majority of people don't like my voice...that's okay...but it doesn't seem like that's the case. Maybe people don't recognize me as a serious musician because I don't play an instrument or create my own stuff. I don't know.
I want to know how to do these things that come so easy to so many people, but it just never works...I don't want to fail at it again.

It's the loneliest number since the number one

2009-07-17T11:21:00.004-04:00

I can't be in a relationship right now

-I live with my parents. At this point in my life it's difficult to have the kind of relationship like I've been having when I have to answer to someone.
-I have something I need to see about...
-I'm moving within the next year and I know firsthand that boys tend to change plans.

Knowing all of that it's hard when I'd actually like to be in one. I miss holding hands, kissing, dancing, cuddling, and most of all someone to talk to about everything and someone to go places with.

Lately it's been difficult. It seems everywhere I turn another one of my friends is getting married, and my single friends seem to be pairing off. I don't mind listening to their stories or letting them have their time...I don't even mind spending time with them as a couple, if I get along with both. But there are times when there is a glaring question sitting in my brain... WHY NOT ME?! But my only answer to that would be, it's just not my turn yet.

I've had too many relationships that started out as "not serious" and ended up a year or so later not knowing what happened, and trying to figure out what was next. Mostly because all of my previously formed plans had gone down the drain. Moving places, doing things, setting goals, all gone because of one person.

And I can't just go out and "date" people...
I'm an attachment whore.
A relationship junkie.
I need familiarity of some sort.
Plus I've never actually been taken out on an actual date...Something that at 25 I feel weird saying. (though I know it's probably not uncommon because of the courtship "norms" of today)

It's a strange reality to have. not being able to be in a relationship.
I don't have the problems that a lot of people face...
There is nothing wrong with me.
I'm a level headed, fun to be around, mildly attractive, clean, healthy human being... but I know I couldn't, even if the opportunity arose, date someone at this point in my life.
I'd rather not put another in the "Disaster" category of my "how did that go?" list.

and this blog was written to try to remind and convince myself of that.

Just keep swimming.

Wallflower syndrome

2009-07-15T21:48:00.002-04:00

I swear I suffer from some kind of social block that causes me awkwardness, Anxiety, paranoia, and bitterness...
Let me explain.
I have this insane idea that the "cool kids" category still exists even when I'm not in High School anymore.
Even in high school this didn't bother me a whole lot, mostly because I didn't really like many of the "cool kids", and often times was on a friendly basis with those I did like. But many of those "cool Kids" I was very good friends with at one time or another and I was abandoned when we entered Middle School, for new friends. I understand that this happens, but I still don't understand how they just ditched me. Is that bad that I still think about that sometimes? Like...why was it Me that was left behind?
ANYWAY, flash forward to present time. Thinking about it, I've never been someone that everyone wants to be best friends with. I'm not someone that people talk about (in a good way), and I'm not someone that everyone seems to want to be around or talk to.
I often find myself in situations where I could either be really outgoing, but fail miserably. I suddenly become overcome with this feeling that I'm not good enough to be socializing with those people I happen to be with. This usually happens when it's a group of people. But then there are times when I meet someone and get to know them a bit and enjoy them as a person, and when I think about it, if circumstances were never the way they are, they would probably never give me the time of day...but I try, and then I get the feeling that I'm being judged when I start to let them get to know me.
Maybe I'm crazy, maybe I'm right I don't know.
and Maybe I'm just shooting myself in the foot with preconceived notions of the "cool Kids" and my background with them.
Socially I can be a very outgoing, talkative, and enjoyable person to be around, but for some reason a lot of people don't get the chance to see that, and I miss out on enjoying other people.
This has turned into more rambling than it was meant...I just don't know if I'm the only one who has this "cool kids" issue. But I've been noticing lately that it's a bit of a problem in my life.

Will/When/am

2009-06-18T15:37:00.003-04:00

At work, not much to do today. it's pretty quiet around here...
I started looking up info on the school I want to go to next year. Every time I look at the site, I just get more excited and determined to go.
Their Live sound program is launching tonight at the venue "the Fridge" in Brixton. all the info is up about what the course entails and it's just amazing. I get a big goofy smile on my face when I read about all of this stuff.
The money issue, well, I've come to terms with the whole Loan thing. But it's what I want and this is what I have to do to make it happen. it won't be so much...I am hoping the exchange rate lowers a bit though. it used to be 17-18,000 to go, now it's up in the 20's..eep! I think it'll be better by next year. I hope. but yeah, I should be able to save up a decent chunk of money in the next year.
I've started to use the phrase "when I go to London" and "I am going to school next year" and "I will do this". I visualize at least once a week. I also research cost of living. I can get a decent room there for not very much at all, which makes things optimistic. :)
My trip is getting closer and closer. I'm going to ask for time off next month, and my boss is someone that would let me take a week to go overseas. He loves to travel and I know he would understand. I was talking about it last night with a girl I work with and she was pretty sure he'd give me the time off if I asked. Flights are decently priced, I just have to figure out where to leave from. Albany or Newark, Albany is obviously much easier, but it's more expensive and I can't connect to virgin, which I love and would prefer to travel on. But Newark is a pain in the ass to get to and would probably have to lose a day or leave work a few hours early to drive my rickety car 3 hours into Jersey, which I'm not thrilled about. Maybe someone will be willing to drive me...I can only hope. haha
Right now I just have to stay positive and work to save up the money.
This. Will. Happen.

The Tutu Incident

2009-06-01T08:29:00.009-04:00

So last week I opened my big mouth on DFTBA radio and told everyone that I was going to wear a Tutu to the 789 gathering in NYC. Oh man. So I thought okay, I have instructions to make one, cool! no problem! Then I got to reading instructions more and learning more about the material, and figured that I would get some really cool blue shade of taffeta the next time I went to the city within the next few weeks. but then I got thinking that I wanted to make a pettiskirt because that was more of what I talked about ages ago...but after looking into it I found out that those involve upwards of 40 yards of fabric! HOLY MOTHER! so last night I did some research and found some fairly priced ones online. (some places sell them for over $100...this place has some cute ones for $60) so I decided on a color and tried to play around with Polyvore to make an outfit. This is the skirt I was thinking about:

but the more I tried to find something the more it didn't fit and the more I got frustrated and started feeling more and more like maybe I shouldn't. I'm going to my first gathering, where people just come in their street clothes to hang out and meet other people. I don't want to be the center of attention or even look like I'm trying to be. I wouldn't wear it again (I had hope to wear it to the No Doubt Concert 2 weeks before as well) and as much as I would love to prance around in it, it's just not something I would wear out. so frustrated, I went to sleep.

This morning I got up with a clear head and thought about my original idea. I like it. I can make it. it could be really cute, and it would look like something I bought at a store instead of a costumer's. So here's what i figure:

I'm going to make something like this with a bright blue taffeta and just wear a plain black t-shirt or tank with it. much less "HI I'M HERE TALK TO ME!" and more "Hi! I'm fun! Come Play!" which is a lot more like my personality.
It'll be ruffly and colorful and cute and I won't feel weird wearing it! :) Problem solved. I think I will also acquire an inexpensive sewing machine to put it together. I mean, I could do it by hand, but it'll probably be easier if I don't. haha
So yeah, problem solved. now I just have the issue of making it...WISH ME LUCK! haha

The best advice ends with movie plots

2009-05-15T14:26:00.001-04:00

fallofautumndistro 2:25 PM
I would probably tell him, worse that could happen is he laughs at you and you're hurt for three or four days and then you move on and find someone awesome to spend your time with. best that could happen is he feels the same way and they write a movie about it and Meg Ryan plays you and Tom Hanks plays him and you earn phat royalty checks for life.

<3